#the wait to post this ones gonna kill me fr-
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lovely-english-rose · 7 months ago
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another drawing down!!!!!
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seventh-district · 1 year ago
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it’s finally getting cold enough that i can bring my cardigan collection back into rotation without feeling like i’m gonna melt into a puddle the second i step outside!!!
#Seven.txt#my face#i have rematerialized back out of the void to once again make my once-in-a-blue-moon selfie & life update post#i’m running on 4 hours of restless sleep and the single banana i ate for lunch earlier today. let’s do this#hrrrrg i hate the lighting in my bathroom but i refuse to take pictures in the absolute Mental Illness Disaster Zone™️ that is my bedroom#anyways. got diagnosed with Mystery Pain Syndrome at the dentist today. so now i take ✨steroids✨#the less funny explanation is that my tooth still hurts with pressure nearly a month post-root canal and That’s Not Good#so we’re trying some new medications to see if that fixes it. and if not then who knows. root canal pt.2 the sequel. or extraction. sigh#and so the Dental Saga continues. todays visit went quite well in spite of the unforeseen mystery pain delaying the tooth-shaving plans#we had some time to kill so he managed to fill some of my other tiny cavities while i was there today so that’s good#okay moving on. what else. uhh. OH they finally came out and ran the fiber to the house last week!!! now i’m just waiting on one more-#-guy to come and finish the interior install and the long awaited fast internet will finally be mine eheheheheeeee#now i can feel my hours upon hours of unedited gameplay footage breathing down my neck :)#man i’ve got so much stuff piled up right now. i’m drowning in Tasks and it’s a lil overwhelming but i’ll handle it all! eventually#uhhhhm my current writing project is coming along well! i’ve never put so much time and effort into a oneshot before in my life#its a labor of love though and i think i’m gonna be really proud of myself (and the fic) once it’s complete#even if no one reads it bc it’s so goddamn self indulgent and kinda lowkey throws canon out the window but like. fuck it!#if i want Astarion to write a song on piano and perform it for me while mentally taking me on a trip down memory lane. then so be it#fr though i’ve never written anything quite like this and i rlly want to do it justice. even if its unrealistic i still want it to be Good#in other news i received word that one of the chickens i sponsor at my local Gentle Barn has passed away so i had a lil cry abt that#i feel so bad for his little tiny chicken wife. they obviously loved each other and it’s like. so sad when one half of an old couple dies#like. she pulled him out of his depression after his 1st wife died. now who’s gonna be there to pull Her out…#anyways let’s not get all sad about that again. in happier news my cat who i presumed died/got killed has returned home uninjured!!!#after that huge stray dog chased her into the woods i thought we’d never find or see her again#but then the morning after i started grieving her she showed back up hungry as hell yet completely unharmed like the enigma that she is#so that’s one definite highlight from earlier this month. uhh what else. rapid fire summary of the past few weeks let’s go-#Jersey turned 10! Bullet turned 10! my 6 year Veganniversary happened! i’m approaching 700 days on DuoLingo!#i’ve written more than 20 thousand words! i’ve been facing some fears! fighting my OCD! taking care of myself! (kinda!)#anyways things are far from being all sunshine and roses around here but i’m trying to focus on the good stuff for the most part#for now tho i have a headache and have reached 30 tags so it’s time to go shovel some mashed potatoes into my mouth :)
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imaginesig · 7 months ago
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“Could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived”
pt2: "Ditch the clowns, get the crown / baby I'm the one to beat"
Lewis Hamilton x Reader
SMAU
The reader is a singer-songwriter who just broke up with long term fiancé Lewis Hamilton. Of course she wrote a gut wrenching album to cope.
This is gonna be a lot of shitting on Lewis— absolutely no hate! I just love a good heartbreak and the Tortured Poets Department
Also dates aren’t accurate bc I don’t have time to worry abt all that and I totally stole all of this from real life- not an ounce of originality
yn_ln
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yn_ln: pinky promise to always by your side 🏎️
Tagged: lewishamilton
lewishamilton pinky promise to always be by YOUR side
yn_ln ♥️
mercadesamgf1 always a pleasure to host our pop princess!
yn_ln always a pleasure to be hosted!!
user1 looks always kill in the paddock
user2 ugh to be in the F1 paddock watching my driver fiancee on weekends I'n not touring
user3 stunning!!
user4 the pinky promise makes me physically ill😭
user5 fr WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN
carmenmmundt gorgeous! Always a good time with you 🫶
yn_ln dinner soon?
carmenmmundt yes please!!
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lewishamilton
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lewishamilton: could’ve been better but back to work for next week
Tagged: yn_ln
user1 being a Hamilton fan used to be fun, I used to be happy
user2 the second photo is so fanfic coded I can't
user3 omg yes!!
user4 maybe Ferrari will be championship #8
user5 hottest couple in the paddock
mercadesamgf1 watch out Australia 👊💥
yn_ln
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Liked by lewishamilton, sabrinacarpender, user92, and 929,290 others
yn_ln: Argentina I’m so glad we were able to dance my best dress with you! Until next time 🫶🎇
tagged: no one
user1 BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE
user2 babe wake up a dancing Taylor post just dropped
sabrinacarpender such an electric crowd!!
yn_ln thank you for your hype work
lewishamilton: wonderful show once again!!
user3 best night ever
user4 AHHH STUNNING
user5 manifesting tickets so hard rn
lewishamilton posted a story
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Caption: Help me hold on to you ♥️
ynupdates
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Liked by user1, user5, user9, and 819,109 others
ynupdates: Superstar Y/n L/n and boyfriend Lewis Hamilton after her show in Argentina!!
tagged: lewishamilton, yn_ln
user1 LMAO the update account rlly said she's everything and he's just Ken
user2 the wine was iconic!!
user3 omg that's my photo!!
user4 we thank you for your service
user5 you know she was jumping with joy bc of those boots
user6 omg irl! I can't imagine how her feet feel after heels all show
user7 they are so sweet
user8 get yourself a man who takes you out after work
user9 my fav couple fr fr
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yn_ln
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liked by sabrinacarpender, carmenmmundt, user9, and 928,029 others
ln_yn: Round of applause for Brazil for their incredible rain show!!
tagged no one
user1 the first pic 😳
user2 chills, literal chills
user3 the entire vibes of the whole show was wow
user4 I agree and I was watching through a fuzzy live stream
user5 anybody else need illicit affairs (angry verson) on Spotify now
user6 me me me!!
user7 Y/n make it happen
user8 it kinda felt personal ngl
user9 best night ever!! I went as fearless in a gold dress and to say I danced in a storm in my “best dress” with Y/n was incredible!!
user10 omg that’s so lucky!!
yn_ln
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liked by user92, sabrinacarpender, girlsinred, and 928,929 others
yn_ln: Thank you South America for welcoming me with open arms for this leg of the tour!! I will miss you all dearly over break but rest and relaxation is important for an awesome European leg!!
tagged: no one
user1 I’m gonna miss the fuzzy live streams 😭
user2 gets some rest Queen!!
user3 I can’t wait for the second leg!! Let’s go Europe🫶🫶
user4 it’s go time to get my Eras outfit
user8 I need ideas!!
user4 me and my boyfriend are going as Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince
user9 I’m dressing in a white dress with a small veil that says “fucked in the head” and messed up makeup bc champagne problems is one of my favs
user10 I love it!!
user5 anybody else sad Lewis wasn’t at these last few shows, nor was she at any races or seen near mercades home base
user6 they’ve been together for 6 years, I’m not worried abt them spending some time focused on their jobs without each other
user7 yea and they’re really private so I’m sure they’ll catch up plenty during her break
lewishamilton
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liked by mercadesamgf1, user1, user8, and 928,292 others
lewishamilton: not the results we needed but that’s what growing is all about
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lewishamilton
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liked by georgerussel, mercadesamgf1, user83, and 718,292 others
lewishamilton: that’s P2💪
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mercadesamgf1 that's our driver!!🏆
georgerussell congrats man! bloody good driving today
lewishamilton double point weekend
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yn_ln
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liked by user4, user9, ynhq, and 918,918 others
yn_ln: All’s fair in love and poetry, April 4th
tagged: no one
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Twitter pre-album release—
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Twitter post-album release—
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yn_ln
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liked by: user433, user94, user93, and 282,209 others
yn_ln: surprise!! "The Tortured Poets Department: Eros" out now!! This edition includes two new songs, "So High School" and "The Alchemy"
tagged: no one
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artoodeetootired · 8 months ago
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lowkey
📖 an f1 driver and a singer are both known for being beasts in their respective fields, but everyone knows they are ironically the shyest in reality- especially when it comes to attraction. they were hidden out of respect for their privacy, until they realised loving shouldn't be a secret.
💭 op!81 x fem!singer (smau)
🎧 lowkey - niki
🃏masterlist🃏
🫧“us in a king size, keep it a secret. say i’m ur queen, but i don’t wanna leave this lowkey.” 🫧
p.s (let's pretend the qatar and las vegas gp's are rounds 10 + 12 of 24 respectively hehe)
ynuser
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Tagged: bsfuser
ynuser so... been kind of busy lately...
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forynln U DISAPPEAR FOR 5 MONTHS AFTER UR LAST ALBUM AND POST OUTTA NOWHERE... girl u cannot keep doing this to us...
-> user1 lol watch her
-> user2 Bruh stfu she literally gave us a god sent album made of unicorn shit she doesn't owe u anything
bsfuser i hate you for telling me what's boutta go down but not let me say shit to anyone 😞
-> user3 it's ok bestie u can tell me, i won't tell anyone :)
ynluv How she is so different irl compared to her stage self still baffles me to this day.
-> user4 FR like wdym u gonna be busting out moves that get u viral then act like the sweetest creature on earth when u out here?? 😭
-> user5 duality go prr. she's probably the shyest celebrity i've ever seen.
-> user6 I can't believe she's an '03 baby.
gracieabrams omg ur orange cat
-> user6 car*
-> user7 car*
-> user8 luv u gracie
user9 orange suits yn so well
user0 lando is such a fanboy 😂
-> user| him and half the grid have been so consistent with promoting her LMAO
oscarpiastri posted a story 5m
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landonorris: would've been right next to u if stroll hadn't crashed again
mclaren: 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
user_: being very calm compared to ur reaction after lance's fiasco today LOL
logansargeant: LET'S GOOO
user@: wow our pastry posts after a century
alexalbon: oi why didnt you take lily's and my advice to post with yn's music if u asked us in the first place...
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f1
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f1 Our special guest performer and new partner for the 16th round on our calendar, Las Vegas, has been confirmed; a little fun before the racing begins! We bet you guys will like this one... 🤭
Until then, round 11 in Netherlands next weekend 🇳🇱 Stay tuned!
Liked by rihanna, katyperry, ynuser, and 795,392
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user! omg i have been waiting for this
f1forlife istg if they bring out the same performers as before...
fanacc the amount of singers liking this post is really fucking with us LOL
alexalbon hi f1 pls tell me u listened to us and booked the grid's voted fav 😸
-> charlesleclerc agreed.
-> maxverstappen1 agreed.
-> landonorris @oscarpiastri and i will boycott.
-> oscarpiastri mate i didn't even vote.
-> landonorris okay fine but u do like yn/ln right? ...right? 🔪
-> oscarpiastri ...
-> landonorris dw everyone osc's just shy no need to cancel him
-> danielricciardo 💃🏽
-> lance_stroll wait there was a vote?
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ynuser
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ynuser switch up
Liked by racerbia, selenagomez, bsfuser, and 865,744 others
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forynln she's killing us and she knows it damn well
user pls just one hint 😭
user how do u feel about oscar piastri not liking u LMAO
arianagreenblatt gorg bestie 😩
user the aesthetic change is very sus
user ladies and gentlemen, the queen of singing, dancing, and gatekeeping
-> user the way we still pine after her and her whereabouts even though she is the most nonchalant pop girl out there
-> bsfuser she's cooking smth 🧐
-> frd2 yk smth dont u 🥸
2 weeks later...
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Instagram
georgerussell63 posted a story 20sec
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lewishamilton: why did i not see toto doing this????
ynuser: it was a pleasure meeting u too 🤠
f1: You boys are very welcome
totowolff: George...
-> georgerussell: please don't fire me
landonorris: ok but did u see the way she looked at me??
-> georgerussell lando, u know full well she was looking at someone else
-> landonorris shut up :(
-> georgerussell i will not allow u to ruin her with ur playboy antics
-> landonorris EXCUSE ME
landonorris and f1 🔁
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Tagged: f1, ynuser, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, georgerussell63, fernandoalo_official, maxverstappen1, and oscarpiastri
landonorris best. weekend. ever.
mini photo dump of the boys at the concert 'cause @ynuser actually performed for us 🤯🤯 we're such huge fans- it was epic meeting you!
Liked by racerbia, selenagomez, bsfuser, and 2,993,840 others
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landonorris p.s. oscar loves her, he's just shy
-> oscarpiastri lando u idiot
-> logansargeant i can confirm ahem
mclaren we advocated for this very hard, just so yk...
-> user0 the gods (you) have bestowed us simpletons (seriously) with such a blessing (yn and mclaren interactions)
-> userl for the whole grid? the fans? ...or a particular someone? 🤭
ynuser epic meeting me??? bro i almost fainted meeting u guys and drivers i've been a fan of since i was 10 😭😭😭
-> bsfuser how was it omg
-> ynuser LOL definitely an interesting experience...
-> landonorris omg she replied 😭
-> georgerussell bro she called u bro
user_ im convinced theyre music drunk and not substance drunk here 😮‍💨
ynuser
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Tagged: f1
ynuser you all already know. this thread is as aesthetically chaotic as my mind rn.
thank you to my team for handling such a mess of me when since i got this invitation !! could not be here, or look this decent without any of u.
thank you to @f1 from the bottom of my heart. i've been such a fan since i was in nappies, nd you guys just made a dream of mine come true. from the races, new friends, to performing for such a crowd in vegas, it has been one of the most surreal weekends of my life. you all just know im gonna be clutching on to this partnership for as long as i breathe. nd congrats to @maxverstappen1, @oscarpiastri, nd @charlesleclerc on the podium ! until next time 🏎💋✨
(last slide is real footage of me meeting toto wolff)
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redbullracing thank you for stopping by our pit!
-> mclaren ok but she went to ours first
-> scuderiaferrari yeah... she liked us most though. should've seen her face when she walked in.
-> mercedesamgf1 you guys know she was a long-time mercedes fan before this right??
-> landonorris what is going on? (she definitely liked hanging out with us more)
-> logansargeant lol you're so delulu (laughed way harder with my group)
oscarpiastri thank you too! we should hang out again sometime soon
-> landonorris 'hang out' pfft sure
-> user omg oscar commenting on a non-f1 person's post??? a FEMALE nonetheless????
-> oscarpiastri everyone has to chill fr
bsfuser that’s MY BESTIE
-> user she is GLOWING
-> ynimagine mommy??? sorry. mommy??? sorry.
-> user she is SNATCHED WTF
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: danielricciardo, ynuser
oscarpiastri 2nd in vegas! amazing job to the team for this accomplishment, daniel for his dedication, nd yn, who we're all still star-struck by. cheers! 🍾
(credit to @pierregasly's story for second slide)
Liked by ynuser, f1, danielricciardo, and 1,329,866 others
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user guys istg i was in the paddock the whole time AND i know what i saw. so when i say they hit it off really well...
user omg oscar even picked up on her 'nd' habit 😭
ynuser 🧡🧡🧡
-> user u are actually an angel sent from the depths of hell in the best possible way. the setlist??? the body and face??? the personality???
landonorris oscar you... 😨 when did u even go to the front of the stage for that last pic????
lewishamilton cute, flirty, teenage stuff and all but are we not gonna talk about danny ric
-> danielricciardo i think we should just go back to gushing about oscar's crush
-> carlossainz55 his crush??? what am i missing????
-> charlesleclerc the baby has grown up
bsfuser 🤨
f1
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Tagged: ynuser
f1 yn appreciation post 🤍🤍🤍
Could not have asked for a better performer and partner to grace us with her presence this weekend 👏🏼
Liked by ynuser, mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 3,071,008 others
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user my timeline is EXPLODING
user converting f1 fans into yn fans too
landonorris slay
-> danielricciardo slay
-> pierregasly slay
-> alexalbon slay
-> lewishamilton what is 'slay'?
-> charlesleclerc slay
-> maxverstappen1 slay
ynuser thank u thank uuu
-> user9 queen what were u on tonight??
-> {user} not even her debut was this hype 💀
ynworld STEP ON ME
f1__grid bruh this is so unecessary... she clearly just wants attention
-> user# stay pressed ur favs like her more than u <3
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3 weeks later...
oscarpiastri posted a story 10sec
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Liked by ynuser, mclaren, maxverstappen1, and others
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user: soooo wonder who took this photo 🧐
user: u guys got smth to tell us? ;)
alexalbon: why do u look depressed today
landonorris: where are u bro
user: what's ur fav yn song?
ynuser: im sorry i can't make it today osc :(
-> oscarpiastri: it's okay, best to let everyone cool down anyways. i'll see u next week?
-> ynuser: i promise :)
1 week later...
ynuser posted a story 30sec
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Liked by bsfuser, f1, oscarpiastri, and others
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lewishamilton: ayeee my fav coming over to the pit today?
-> ynuser: i wouldn't miss it for the world 😸 plus fans are dying to know how u pick ur fashion sense out
-> lewishamilton: oh lord
f1: 🤍
landonorris: pls be kind with the question this time :(
-> ynuser: aweeee
-> ynuser: no.
oscarpiastri: wya??
3 more weeks later...
oscarpiastri posted a story 16sec
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Liked by nicolepiastri, mclaren, danielricciardo and others
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ynuser posted a story 37sec
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Liked by bsfuser, f1, nicolepiastri, and others
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1 month, 3 races, and 2 performances later...
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~3 months later...
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: ynuser
oscarpiastri i can't take it anymore. since u guys have wanted to know, anyway.
you've been on my mind since the day i met you (nd yes, admittedly since lando showed me your music videos), nd then when i met you with the biggest crush, i quickly decided that you are one of the most talented, beautiful, kindest people ever. fuck all if i just got my first win, it wouldn't have meant anything without u. i can't have asked for a better partner in crime to wear my number at the races.
although we've been pretty great at keeping it low key these past few months to just family and friends, i wanna show you off, my love x
Liked by ynuser, landonorris, mclaren, and 5,329,866 others
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oscarpiastri also, ty to the grid for keeping it private, nd yes, i will be treating u all for dinner.
-> danielricciardo LFGGGGG
user oh my god.
jennaortega the question is if she beat him at karting
-> oscarpiastri she did...
carlossainz55 i never thought this day would come
landonorris cant put both my happiness and bewilderment that you actually hard launched into words
-> georgerussell character. development.
user ONE OF MY FAV SINGERS BECAME MY FAV WAG TOO AHHHHHHHH
arianagrande y'all cute asf 😭😭😭
user I CALLED IT
-> user nah dont u lie we all thought we were lying to ourselves LMAO
bsfuser one wrong move and i’ll send stroll to do more than just hit u on track 😺
-> oscarpiastri ;-;
-> maxverstappen1 u could send any one on the grid to do it, and they'd be happy to
user they're so in love im bawling
landonorris just so u guys know, his three sisters steal her away from him every week to hang out LOL
-> oscarpiastri that was totally unecessary
-> nicolepiastri give the ppl what they want ossie
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ynuser
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
ynuser sike.
'orange suits yn so well'... damn right for him 🧡
this man has inspired me in too many ways, that aside from teaching me how to love and be loved. it's been pretty hard having all these memories, but not being able to live them freely because of the pressure. but i wouldn't do it with anyone else. so im gonna be 'showing you off' in my latest single, agora hills, coming out tomorrow night for my love's first win x
(to clarify, f1 has allowed me to take ONE side ONCE, so im not jobless :) ... yet)
Liked by oscarpiastri, dojacat, bsfuser and 6,001,685 others
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frd1 about fucking time
oliviarodrigo this is so cute omg
alexalbon ahem i think i should get some credit for being the ultimate matchmaker here
-> f1 actually, i think it all goes to us.
-> user 💀
logansargeant THE LAST PHOTO PLS SEND IT TO ME LMAO
gracieabrams omg him with her cat 😭😭
-> user gracie, luv, it's car*
-> user car*
-> sabrinacarpenter dw babes i don't get this shit either
user oscar first win AND yn new music AND hard launches from the softest ppl ever??? has the universe finally decided to bless me???
user they were literally meant to be
user what happened to the shy versions of themselves oml
tatemcrae the hottest, most sincere, and talented celebrity couple rn
bsfuser and i was there to witness it all 😌
-> charlesleclerc so was i
-> bsfuser i was first tho
-> charlesleclerc fair enough
-> landonorris i was there the most
-> bsfuser i was their couple counsellor
-> landonorris i was their matchmaker
-> alexalbon NO YOU WERENT
-> bsfuser i was first to find out
-> landonorris no you werent
-> landonorris right? @oscarpiastri @ynuser
-> landonorris RIGHT????
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ynuser
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
ynuser for u, ur first win, and to many more.
as an extra for u all, 'lowkey' is also out to show my progression from wanting to keep it a secret to having him make me scream his name <3 hope u love us as much as i do.
Liked by oscarpiastri, dojacat, bsfuser and 6,581,921 others
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user the caption???????????????????
user holy shit mother is mothering and father is fathering because never have i ever heard her make a track with sm detail about her partner in it...
-> user FR like where did the two of them go?? almost 8 months but they come back like they've aged a decade
-> user NO CAUSE WTF is 'suck a little dick in the bathroom, who that man with the big strong hands'???? miss yn??? are the both of u feeling okay????
-> user you'd think introvert + introvert = coma, but ig double negatives still apply here
dojacat bitch these tracks SLAP
user okay but osc's guns 👀
sza god, when will this shi happen to me?
mclaren All ur songs on repeat in the paddock.
-> mercedesamgf1 It's true, all the teams agreed
-> redbullracing (the only time we all agree)
user how tf did we get bashful yn and blushing osc to... this??
-> ynuser life's full of mysteries.
landonorris i miss the person i was before hearing these two songs...
-> georgerussell it's true, as big of a fan i am of the two of u, some things are meant to stay between ppl...
-> charlesleclerc i am not saying anything, which means i can get invited to the wedding, yeah?
-> ynuser yes.
-> oscarpiastri yes.
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a/n: as u can probably see, i lowkey gave up half way cause i never realised how much work this takes :,)
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sl0t4matt · 8 months ago
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hard launch with hector fort 🙏🏻🙏🏻
h. fort | hard launch
love love this trope. thank u, anon!! also added a few more posts than just the hard launch hope u don’t mind :)
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youruser kinda in my wag era rn
liked by hctorforrt_ and 679.055 others
random OMG WHAT
random she’s fine af how did he pull her lmao
���┈➤ random they are both very attractive bro
random did somebody say hard launch?!
yourbestfriend hottest wag
╰┈➤ youruser luv u
random who’s she and why is she with hector
╰┈➤ random prolly his gf
hctorforrt_ i still don’t know what that means
╰┈➤ youruser r u slow i told you like 10 times
lamineyamal thank god i can’t keep secrets
╰┈➤ youruser 🙄🙄
╰┈➤ random lmao lamine knew
random can someone watch my grwm? 🥺
╰┈➤ random no 🥺
marcguiu9 someone took my bitch
╰┈➤ youruser bohoo 🥺
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ marc 😫🫃
╰┈➤ youruser homosexuals
╰┈➤ random theyre dating atp
╰┈➤ random LMAO i love her 😭
random noo hector 😓
random wha- shocked.
lamineyamal gonna be a long ass era
liked by creator
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hctorforrt_ still not sure how i pulled this 
liked by marcguiu9 and 308,940 others
youruser ur cute
random hottest couple
random i think we missed a chapter or two
random crying rn she’s pretty tho
fcbarcelona champ on and off the pitch 🤙
liked by creator
random lol this came out of nowhere
random she’s beautiful
liked by creator
random WTH HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND
╰┈➤ random yes and she mogs u
random they compliment each other so well
╰┈➤ random fr both hot af
marcguiu9 i accept i guess
╰┈➤ youruser thank you for your blessing🙏🏼
_ferminlopez my kids
╰┈➤ random daddy
╰┈➤ _ferminlopez come again?
╰┈➤ random oh
random she only wants him for money
╰┈➤ youruser omg you caught me 😰
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ lmao
╰┈➤ random she’s a model i’m sure she has her own money
433 goat good luck!
liked by creator
random HARD LAUNCH ⁉️
hctorforrt_ added to their story
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hctorforrt_ she said she would look “so sexy” pregnant
╰┈➤ youruser bitch why would u post that (i would totally rock being preggo)
hctorforrt_ wym you always look good (only with my children tho)
youruser you flirt 🤭 also i’m totally not letting you get away with this
hctorforrt_ yeah sure
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hctorforrt_ i was zipping up her dress lol
liked by youruser and 208.086 others
youruser stop talking big you literally couldn’t do it for shit
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ i did it in the end tho
╰┈➤ youruser yeah when we were already late
random the last one 😍 she’s so cute
lamineyamal papi when r u posting yourself 🥵
liked by creator
╰┈➤ paucubarsi i miss his face too 😔
╰┈➤ marcguiu9 me three
╰┈➤ youruser ew
╰┈➤ random they are so funny 😭
youruser i’m gonna get revenge for the story wait up
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ shivers down my spine 😱
╰┈➤ youruser okay bitch it just got worse
paucubarsi i think she has something on her nose
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ omg really bro 😱
╰┈➤ youruser leave him alone 🙄
random it’s always the models
╰┈➤ random literally stop calling yourself a fan when you say shit like that
╰┈➤ random just let him be happy omg?!
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youruser i’m kind of liking this wag lifestyle
liked by marcguiu9 and 469.976 others
marcguiu9 JAJAJAJAJA
liked by creator
random omg haha hector looks so cute in that picture
lamineyamal slaying fr
╰┈➤ youruser ate fr
paucubarsi the pic of hector is killing me
╰┈➤youruser u and everyone else
hctorforrt_ you’re evil
╰┈➤ youruser it’s your own fault 🥱
hctorforrt_ just because i’m in love w u doesn’t mean u can do shit like that!!!
╰┈➤ youruser aw you’re in love with me 🤭
lamineyamal nah deserved after that story
╰┈➤ youruser i know right!
╰┈➤ paucubarsi fr did you dirty with that
╰┈➤ hctorforrt_ you’re supposed to be MY friends?!
╰┈➤ youruser hah! they love me more
fcbarcelona hector always been a culer 💙❤️
liked by creator
random why is no one talking about how good she looks?!
liked by creator
645 notes · View notes
f1byjessie · 11 months ago
Text
A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS ━━ LN4.
sometimes the right words are hard to come across, and sometimes everything you need to say can be captured in an image.
( lando norris x photographer!reader )
━━ part three.
INSTAGRAM.
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liked by mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 314,691 others
tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris
yourusername is it time for bahrain yet?! can’t wait to see these two back in action again soon! 🧡
view all 4,981 comments
mclaren We keep asking ourselves the same thing! Our engines are ready and we’re raring to go! 🧡
↳ yourusername you truly understand me mclaren admin
↳ mclaren we think you’re the one who truly understands us y/n
↳ user y/n x mclaren admin?? 🤯 the plot twist none of us saw coming
user missing these lads so much lately
user THE RADIO SILENCE ON OSCAR’S SOCIALS WAS KILLING ME I DEPEND ON THESE MEN TOO MUCH THEY KEEP ME ALIVE 😭😭
user the f1 drought is real rn
user MCLAREN SUPREMACY 2024
↳ user i’m trying to be delulu but we all know it’s just gonna be the mv33 and redbull show again this year 🫤
user soooo are we all just gonna pretend like we didn’t see the pics of her with garrett ward orrrrr?
↳ user no bc i was just thinking the same thing 👀
↳ user wait that was actually her??? cuz you can like barely see her face so i thought it was just a joke???
user what a fake ass bitch
user she only posts other ppl on her acc cuz she knows her ugly ass face would scare everyone else away
user homegirl needs to stay tf away from my man fr 😤😤
user god what a hoe 😒 she already has these two that she could fuck with idk why she needed to go after garrett
user SLUT SLUT SLUT
user if she tries anything with anyone else on the city team i’m gonna lose my shit fr
↳ user same omg
↳ user honestly i’m just glad she didn’t go after grealish or haaland 🙌
↳ user she probably would’ve tried if they weren’t taken already 🙄
↳ user nah i bet she’s totally a homewrecker garrett’s probably just the first on her list
user oh… these comments… 😰
↳ user right???
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liked by mancity, mclaren, and 198,131 others
tagged: mancity
yourusername the city boys know how it’s done! and looking pretty good in orange too 😉
view all 3,971 comments
mancity The lads are looking good indeed! This weekend’s match against Newcastle should be an exciting one! ⚽️🩵
mclaren ✍️ Jeremy ✍️ Doku ✍️ and ✍️ Ruben ✍️ Dias ✍️ McLaren ✍️ 2025
↳ mancity Do you think Lando Norris and Oscar Piastri would look good in sky blue? 🤔
user funny how she posts every city man BUT garrett
user god when does she go back to f1??
↳ user march iirc
↳ user well it can’t get here soon enough jfc
user FUCK OFF WE DON’T WANT YOU
user you’re a slag and should accept the fact that any guy would only want you bc of how easy you are
user i’ll bet my left leg that the only reason the f1 boys haven’t shacked up with her yet is cuz they know she’s probably riddled with disease since she drools over every guy that comes near her 😒 like girl needs to bffr and realize that throwing herself at every male in her vicinity isn’t gonna land her a husband and it just making her even more of a slut
↳ user nah i’ll bet they’ve all already done her over in f1 but nobody will touch her now that they’ve passed her round so she had to come over to football just to try and get someone to touch her again 🙄🙄🙄
user i hope garrett realizes how much of a slut she is and breaks up with her
user sick and tired of bitches like this getting with footballers and being all controlling. like i’ll bet she’s gonna tell garrett he can’t go out and party with his mates anymore bc he has to spend time in with her and then she’ll get all pissy about him having female fans bc she’s insecure and knows that if garrett got to meet a REAL fan he’d jump ship immediately. those of us who ACTUALLY care about footballers know their fans are super important to them and we wouldn’t hinder their relationship with them just bc we’re jealous or insecure. garrett needs to be with someone who actually supports him and is willing to let him do what he wants instead of controlling him like he’s a dog on a leash.
user kys like genuinely
user god i can’t wait for this skank to die 😒
“Hey Lando, it’s me. Your best friend. Again,” you give a humorless chuckle. “I could seriously use some of your wizened advice right about now, so, uh, please just give me a call back when you can. Thanks.”
It seems poetic in a cruel sort of way that less than a week ago you were walking Etihad Campus and feeling like you were on top of the world━ working a new albeit temporary gig, adding the Manchester City name to your list of clients, having photos of world-renowned footballers in your portfolio━ and now you’ve resigned yourself to hiding away in the women’s restroom, locked in a stall because it’s the only place you could think of where nobody would be able to find you.
You’re on the verge of tears and feeling rather stupid for it.
It’s the third time today alone that your call has gone straight to voicemail, and with the dozens of unread texts you’ve sent in the last week added to the mix, it’s starting to paint a picture you’re not very happy with. Lando is ignoring you. Or he’s blocked you. Or he’s blocked you because he’s ignoring you━
You bite down on your lip, hard, to keep back the sob crawling its way up your throat.
You’re not a PR officer, you hadn’t been lying when you told Garrett that, but you’ve spent enough time around the McLaren PR teams that you’ve picked up enough tips and tricks to know, at the very least, that the best thing you can do is just ignore the comments.
That’s what they tell all the athletes.
What they don’t tell the athletes is that ignoring the comments is much easier said than done, especially when your career requires you to have such a significant online presence. And the thing is, despite all of these strangers hounding you with every name under the sun and criticizing your capabilities, qualifications, and very existence, the thing that hurts the most is the radio silence from the only person you know could make it all better.
Now, more than ever, you need your best friend. But he isn’t here.
You tuck your phone into your jacket pocket and unlock the stall with great reluctance. You know better than to be hiding away, shirking your responsibilities while crying over a few missed phone calls. You have a job to do, and a real professional wouldn’t let something as simple as a handful of tasteless comments get in the way of that.
You should be used to them. It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.
Your first month at McLaren wasn’t entirely different.
When you were first hired on, Carlos had been in Formula One for a handful of years already and had built up a devotedly loyal fanbase with a decently large percentage of possessive fangirls who had come for your head the moment your existence had been announced.
The McLaren Instagram account had posted a picture of you standing between their two grinning drivers, your camera strung around your neck, with a very nice caption welcoming you to the team, and despite no indication that you were by any means involved with either of them in a way that went beyond professional, the comments had been taken over by feral teenage girls who saw the act of you simply standing near Carlos to be a direct threat against their “chances.”
Though it had been frustrating being met with childish threats and petty insults in your comments, you hadn’t really held it against any of them. You remember being a teenage girl and crushing on a celebrity. Deep down you knew you never had a chance with them, but that hadn’t stopped you from hanging posters in your bedroom and doodling their name beneath yours inside of scribbled hearts in your diary.
Regardless, it had taken close to a month for the negativity to die down, and you hadn’t had Lando then, either, so now shouldn’t be much different.
In fact, everyone on the Manchester City team━ trainers, physios, media coordinatiors, and anyone inbetween━ has been very polite about everything between you and Garrett. A lot of them have just avoided saying anything about it, which you’re very grateful for because you don’t think you’d be able to hold back your grimace while thanking them for their well wishes, and the few who have mentioned it typically only say something vague like a wishing you the best of luck or hoping you’re happy.
An intern gave you a sympathetic smile the other day, and you’d nearly burst into tears in the middle of the office of the Director of Communications, so you know you aren’t truly alone in this.
You just feel alone.
Exiting the bathroom is a simple affair. There’s no one standing post outside ready to give you any shit for being hidden away, and nobody comes sprinting around the corner as you make your way down the hall to the press conference room that’s been temporarily turned into your base of operations.
You think you’ll probably be able to go the rest of the afternoon without running into anyone, when you open your door and find━ sitting in the front row of the seats typically saved for journalists and the press, scrolling across his phone with a disinterested look painted across his face━ Jack Grealish.
“Jack,” you greet, a bit shocked. You close the door to the room gently behind you, and cross the distance to your desk. “Did we have a meeting scheduled? It must’ve completely slipped my mind, I sincerely apologize.”
He offers you a polite smile. “No, we didn’t, so no need to be sorry. I actually just wanted to check in. See how things are going with everything.”
You blink at him in surprise. Apart from Garrett, you haven’t really had much time to speak with the other players. They wish you good morning and good afternoon when they see you, and if a ball goes astray they always call out for you to watch your head, but between their morning training and their afternoon training, their strategy reviews at lunch, and the frequent in between meetings with physios, nutritionists, and trainers, they don’t get much time to chit chat with a simple photographer.
You clear your throat, “Erm, it’s going well. I’ve gotten some really good shots these past few days. There’s one with Rodrigo that I’m particularly proud of. It should do well with the fans.”
“And things with Ward?”
You purse your lips.
“Figured.” Jack sighs. “Look, nearly everyone you run into here knows or has at least some inkling into what he’s like. He’s a prick. None of the lads on the team like him, it’s why the managers are trying to get him out of here.”
You lower yourself down into your chair. “He told me they were planning to trade him off because of his reputation.”
Jack scoffs, “Yeah, ‘cause that’s the ‘official’ reason. They can’t cut his contract early for legal reasons, so they’re waiting for it to expire and coming up with an excuse for why they ain’t re-signing him. It’s really just ‘cause the rest of us can’t keep dealing with his massive ego and the fact that he’s a misogynistic fuck who doesn’t know the first thing about respect.”
“Fucking tell me about it,” you mutter with a sigh.
If he expected you to defend Garrett and is surprised by the fact that you haven’t, Jack doesn’t show it. He looks relaxed sitting across from you, like you’re having a casual conversation and not actively shit talking a member of his team. It gives you the impression that he knows significantly more about Garrett than you do, and that because of what he knows he probably figured out that one party in the relationship is not the most willing of participants.
“How’d you get all wrapped up it in then? Didn’t figure you to be the type to go after pricks like Ward.”
You debate over whether you should tell him or not. There isn’t much Jack can do about the situation regardless, but it would at least get things off your chest and if someone else knew then maybe you wouldn’t feel so alone anymore.
There’s only so many days you can spend hiding out in the women’s restroom trying not to bawl your eyes out, and you’ve already reached your limit.
You heave a sigh, “It’s kind of fucked up really.” A pen on your desk catches your attention and you start to fiddle with it, avoiding Jack’s eyes which have focused directly onto you. “He asked if I would help him fix up his reputation by pretending to be his girlfriend so he could show everyone that he’s matured and can hold down a steady relationship. When I told him no, he threatened to make up a lie about inappropriate conduct to get me fired and blacklisted from the industry, so for the sake of preserving my career I agreed.”
“Bloody fucking hell,” Jack murmurs, shaking his head. “I’m real sorry he did that, Y/N.”
You shrug. “It’s happened, so, there’s nothing I can really do except wait it out at this point.”
When you look up and meet his gaze, Jack looks murderous. His hands are clenched into fists on the armrests, knuckles white with the strength of his grip. His brows are furrowed, and his lips are twisted downward in a scowl.
“If you need anything,” he starts, “let me know. And I mean it. We all know how Ward can be. He’s a knobhead. So if you need anything━” his emphasis on the word and what that implies makes you feel more comforted than anything has since the whole fiasco started, “━then you let me know, or you tell one of the other boys and they’ll find me, alright?”
All you can do is nod.
INSTAGRAM.
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liked by user, user, and 213,976 others
yourusername there’s no place like home
comments have been disabled
━━ tags: @maih23 @urfavnoirette @leclercsluv @f1luvur @formulaal @a-disturbing-self-reflection @starlightpierre @chezmardybum @marshmummy @405rry
━━ a/n: no lando yet, but we've got a cutesy little grealish scene to make up for it because i couldn't have a story with manchester city and not include him! lowkey writing this part made me wanna write for a footballer too... anyways! hope you all enjoy!
493 notes · View notes
lunavrse · 10 months ago
Text
DREAM GIRL
CHARLES LECLERC
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summary ★ : charles decides to take a page out of justin bieber's book. let's see how that works out for him.
category ★ : smau.
notes ★ : disregard all times and dates, they don't matter. all spelling mistakes are intentional. everything is fake and unrealistic but thank you delusion. terrible flirting and the usual type of jokes/language you see on the internet.
me basically:
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tagged: yourbestfriend
Liked by yourbestfriend, yourfriend, user61 and 147 272 others
youruser so proud of ﹫yourbestfriend, she absolutely killed it and even took some cool pictures of me💚🥂 new video coming 🔜
View all 534 comments
yourbestfriend thank you for coming my love💚
youruser always😘
yourbestfriend it's not hard when you have such a gorgeous subject
youruser thank yewww
user6 stunning 😍
user12 you look amazing and ﹫yourbestfriend did fantastic!
user89 THE DRESS🤩
youruser i knowww, it's from meshki
user3 you're a beauty
user62 i need to know where the dress is from 🙏
youruser it's from meshki !
user56 can't wait to stare at the screen for the next few hours
user47 isn't her videos usually like 20~45 minutes?
user56 i know what i said
user1 oh !
user9 she did her big one😌
user11 pretty!
yourfriend serving face and body
youruser 🤍🤍🤍
user24 face card is lethal
user61 ﹫charles_leclerc
user60 ❤️🔥
user77 can we get a little commotion for the dress🗣️🗣️
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Liked by pierregasly, user61, landonorris and 516 382 others
charles_leclerc who is she? if anyone knows, please tag her.
View all 3 272 comments
user4 nah, this guy
user26 this is crazy.
user92 WHAT IS GOING ON ?!!?!!
user5 is this real? like am i actually seeing this?
user15 he's got to have been hacked
user25 ain't no way
user13 actively going insane thanks to this actually.
user8 giving me flashbacks to december 8th, 2015
user14 i've got ptsd 😭
user10 from what? the war?
user49 bros acting like they were in a war💀
user8 it was a tough time to be a jb fan 😭
user3 IM CRYING
maxverstappen1 is this who we are, is this what we represent??
user3 max is done💀💀
charles_leclerc i said i had a plan, not that it was a good one mate
user1 wish it was me he's looking for
user45 that's me!
user86 in your dreams maybe
user58 get over yourself<3
user20 ﹫youruser
user67 She's so pretty, I want to cry
user76 she's so pretty, i want her
user48 ^^two types of people
user93 my brother in christ, stand up!!!
user50 BRO FORGOT HE'S FAMOUS😭🔥🗣️
user07 he's just like me fr
user84 mans is moving mad📢
user100 this is embarrassing
user34 think im gonna be sick
user30 don't be so dramatic
user51 i don't blame her
user70 she's obviously the prettiest girl ever🙄
user68 ﹫youruser !
user97 that's me !
user59 I'm gonna go cry myself to sleep now
user31 side eye
user29 who is she? she's stunning
user40 why is my fav youtuber in this picture
user46 iconic actually
user17 I know we can't see her face clearly, but she's serving
user21 i know her!
user37 what's her ﹫
user21 it's ﹫youruser, i follow her
user101 i want harry styles to do this but with me
user88 me too lol
user65 this is down bad behaviour
user201 thanks for ruining my day 👍
user248 it's giving wattpad vibes
user119 charles, look at me, this isn't you, think about the kids
user996 i was genuinely scared this was a hard launch
user123 alexa play that should be me
user8 how ironic
user147 ﹫youruser
user313 that's my girlfriend ﹫youruser
user05 praying for this girl cause the toxic charles fans, yikes😬
user000 gonna be delusional and pretend it's me 😁
user128 see i was so excited when i saw the notif and now i'm just 😐
user01 i cried when i saw this post btw
user306 imagine he posted a pic of asking who u are ﹫user43
user43 pls i would cry
user61 ﹫youruser
user007 idk and idc
user400 this is me if you even care
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Liked by yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc, user4 and 253 953 others
youruser hello new people, where'd y'all come from?
View all 1 753 comments
yourbestfriend do you not check your notifications or...
youruser you know i don't
user245 girl...
user4 im in love with you lol
user500 just came from ur yt video, i'm so glad you had fun at the event!
user16 so this is the girl my husband is leaving me for🥲
user04 charles leclerc in her likes😭😭😭 ooh i'm sick
user287 then you're not gonna like this... he's flirting w her
user04 just fell to my knees in despair
user61 so real for that last slide
user56 pretty😍
youruser tysm pretty girl🤎
user791 charles mfing leclerc posted you!?!!!
user792 charles mfing leclerc liked!!
user793 charles mfing leclerc commented!!!
friend3 let's kiss 💋
youruser 👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏾
user005 i too wish to kiss all the pretty girls
user800 idk what's going on rn but i loved your latest video, you and yourbestfriend were so cute and seeing you guys backstage together was sooo wholesome
user494 the part where they saw each other and started hyping each other up was my favourite
use712 her looking up a makeup tutorial 2 hours before she had to leave was so me
user55 he's in her likes y'all!
user942 thanks bud, i would never had noticed without u
user039 oh so she's dumb and ugly 😒
user44 and you're bitter and jealous...
user91 CHARLES LECLERC KNOWS YOU EXIST
use222 I wanna kiss you too 😞
user777 personally, i came from yt
user420 hi *louder than everybody else*
user311 what lip liner are you wearing babes?
youruser ﹫makeupbymario brown lip liner : )
user42 need a makeup tutorial!!!
charles_lerclerc my fault 🧍‍♂️
youruser i'll let it slide cause you're cute
charles_leclerc you think i'm cute? giggling, kicking my feet
youruser and blushing?
charles_leclerc mhmm, yeah
user0 THEY'RE FLIRTING!!!!
user456 deffo flerting
user942 YEAH?!???!!!!
user011 you guys know dms exist right???
user0 damn, i wanted to see this play out more 😭
user811 chill, my man is on this app
user35 she a baddie she know she a ten
user555 face card is never declining 😍
user411 do i want to date you or be you?
user87 so real!
user05 so we all saw them flirt right?
user942 yes😭
user28 STAY AWAY FROM HIM
user69 GET A JOB (directed to you user28)
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Liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, user12 and 443 854 others
youruser day(s) n night(s)
View all 2 748 comments
user103 nottt her trying to be sneaky👀
yourbestfriend am i seriously losing you to a MAN???
youruser 'm always urs pooks💚
yourbestfriend tell loverboy that
user656 charles' new nickname is 🔥
user48 the way charles was here in the first few minutes of her posting💀
charles_leclerc et le prix de la plus belle fille te revient [and the award for the most beautiful girl goes to you]
youruser merci beau garçon
user12 Them speaking French to each other is all that I'm thinking about rn.
user707 A YT MAN?!?!?! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!
user349 wish she was calling me a beautiful boy 😭
use117 i see you 4th slide, studious queen🤧
user824 charles try not to be a simp challenge
user107 level : IMPOSSIBLE
user41 ﹫user23 50 quid that's charles
user23 do you think i'm stupid?
user41 do you want an honest answer or?
user23 do you want to tell me your lastest test score or?
user41 ...
user23 yeah that's what i thought
user662 noooo pls don't be who i think it is
user35 she a baddie with her baddie friend(s)
user723 okay but the lashes ate💅🏾
user991 this is so weird, why are you posting him?
user75 you don't even know if that's him and you're already being defensive over a man who don't want you or even know you exist? don't pmo. get off her page!!!
user940 me when😔
user129 what about us?
user130 what about everything we've been through
user329 who is that man girl
user477 so are we just gonna ignore charles' comment or...
user452 just made me even more sure that it's him
user02 pretty girl<3
user170 if my future boyfriend don't bring me flowers on the first date, i don't want him🙅🏽‍♀️
user244 we get it, for some reason charles leclerc wants you😒
user311 ugh,,, the lip look always eats
user710 real, I'm obsessed
user536 is that charles?
user537 be serious, that is not happening
user539 ok 😐👍
user536 i actually can't be sirius, he's dead. hope this helps👍
user863 imagine that's not him and we're all just being crazy
user37 if that's not him, he's probably crying
user11 shittt, I would too, look at her
user29 he's probably the guy in the photos
user163 we all saw that interview right? it's definitely him
user288 yass, he looked so cute
user565 enough about charles, can we focus on how pretty she and her friends are??
user479 10s across the board fr
user504 I thought you were for the girls 😭
user716 i'm calling it now, that's a date w leclerc
user231 you look stunning 😍
user406 anyone noticed how he liked? he wouldn't do that if she went out on a date with someone else right?
user410 only everybody with eyes?
alex_albon yeah, no, he would be sobbing in a corner if that wasn't him
user410 ARIANA (Alex) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE
use535 so he couldn't have fumbled, right....
user534 well...
user210 alex is just here to create chaos and honestly, i respect that
user73 please don't post your man again😒
user66 real!!! i come here to see you not him🥲
user711 love to see women getting treated right 😌
user385 slide 6 made me sick to my stomach
user858 he brought her flowers😫
user132 PLEASE DON'T BE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE
user705 that HAS to be him
user701 you never know, sometimes he is his own worst enemy
user898 did NOT 🚫❌ like this
user999 what if this was my last straw
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tagged: charles_leclerc, youruser
Liked by user, pierregasly, user0 and others
allthingsleclerc local (monégasque) man seen out with mystery woman who sources claim is yn
View all 843 comments
user624 why is she still serving while blurred
user210 liked by pierregasly 🫣
user833 charles' friends are exposing him 💀
user0 that's definitely ﹫youruser
user04 serving cunt and he's there ig
user547 just becoz it's blurred doesn't mean you can't tell that it's her
user622 he looks miserable, he doesn't like her😭
user595 what? are you of sound mind?
lunavrse pls don't look too closely at the picture 😴
user923 What's the square root of 64?💅🏾
user700 they're just minding their business, why can't y'all do the same?
user674 it's a public place
user700 ☝️🤓 it's a pUbLIc PLaCe
user103 no bc they're lowk matching 😭
user933 it's so over😭😭
user72 that's so cute🥰 who wants to have a sleepover on the highway with me?
user33 that could just be a coincidence?
user172 i actually don't care but THAT DRESS, i need to know where she got it from
user32 oh ! i didn't realise that she was actually his type
user79 ... i wish there was a side eye emoji
user18 oh that's not-
user32 nonono in a sense that he usually dates like brunettes
use499 wdym, 'm pretty sure she is brunette?
user03 we know what you meant lol
user270 wish i could live in delusion
user320 he's probably paying for everything 🙄
user419 and? he's literally a millionaire, if he wants to spend his money on his (alleged) girlfriend let him. it's not your money
user232 girl, pipe down
user890 I don't see the problem?
user52 why do you assume that? do you know her financial situation? or you a close friend of either of theirs who knows what's going on? if the answer to these questions are no, shut the fuck up, thanks<3 peace and light to you.
user562 try not to say mother
user587 [failed]
user612 Why can't she stay away from him?
user258 why can't you mind yr business?
user718 first picture of them out together and they look great
user106 her rn: damn i'm the only bitch serving cunt here😭😭 omg😭 i'm so embarrassedd😭😭😭
user211 she should be at the club, not on gossip pages😭
user261 fuck she looks too good, i wanna kms
user211 real
user586 took a social media break and came back to this😃 great !
user404 i wanna say parents🤭
user648 this actually made my day
user446 Gonna sleep on the tracks tonight🥰
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youruser and you're kenough for me❤️
charles_leclerc thank you barbie !
most beautiful barbie ever❤️
landonorris this ken's job is simp
charles_leclerc you'd be a simp too if you could actually date such a stunning woman but you can't 🫶
landonorris you're a cruel, cruel man
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youruser me gusta la mar🏖️
View all 2 836 comments
yourbestfriend wish i was on a boat right now😔
youruser i literally invited you and you said no?
yourbestfriend i have to face unimaginable horror (work)
user12 that boat looks familiar
yourbestfriend you look stunning babes💚
youruser tysm, means the most coming from uuu pookie 💚
use501 forget about charles and give me one(1) chance pls
charles_leclerc me gustas tú
user779 SCREAMING
user784 chill, it's a song lyric
user779 yeah but have you heard the song???
charles_leclerc gorgeous view, and the sea looks good too i suppose
youruser my view was much better but thank you<3
charles_leclerc i doubt that. je pourrais te regarder pendant des heures sans jamais me lasser. [i could look at you for hours and never get bored]
user055 someone is coming for your smooth operator title ﹫carlossainz55
user964 Charles Rizzclerc???
yourbestfriend she's screaming btw
youruser no i'm not
yourbestfriend then why do i have a vn of you screaming?
charles_leclerc 😊
user96 it's quiet🤐... no back talk
user71 stay focused my brothers, we must stay focused
user53 i am looking respectfully, i promise
user131 when will someone tell me the things he says to her🙃
user677 everytime you post a picture my jaw drops
yourfriend oh my gorgeous coco butter melanated caramel skinned goddess, please notice me🙏🏾
youruser oh you've got jokes🤨
yourbestfriend GOODBYE😭 im showing this to ur man
yourfriend you really thought you did suttin🤣 he knows who he's dating😋
user22 I would sacrifice my favourite duck plushie for just one chance to be in your presence 🙇‍♀️
youruser that's so sweet yet so disturbing pls keep your plush safe
user22 Yes queen, whatever you say 🫡
user803 if you look close enough, you can see me drowning myself in the ocean 🤗
user70 forget vroom vroom boy n give a g(ay)irl a chance😫
user312 charles in his simp era
use314 love to sea it
user312 that's a terrible pun and i hate that i laughed
user2 you know who has a boat??? charles
user057 the way that you're actually glowing in these🫠
user717 i love the hat, it just kinda brings the whole thing together
lilymhe you look amazing! and i love the bikini!
youruser tysm🫶🏾 i love u!!!
user742 a friendship i never knew i needed
user335 Since when did Lily and Yn know each other??
user386 since they're both wags, it only makes sense
user360 but yn's not a wag
user386 yet
user109 hi lol
user634 her body is teaaa
user7 did someone say body-ody-ody-ody
user19 he can do so much better than you
user482 I know you want him but I can be so much better than him in so many ways, I swear, please please please please *begs excessively*
user888 Does Charles have her post notifications on or what?
user938 i'd say yes cause how else would he like her posts so fast
user064 the swimsuit is everythinggg
user229 it's giving hot girl summer ⛱️
user177 i could start a whole new ocean with the amount of tears i've cried
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charles_leclerc me gusta el viento
View all 3 276 comments
user905 he knows exactly what he's doing
user200 Not him having the exact same meal picture as her
user080 let's talk about the matching captions
user621 most beautiful man I've ever seen
youruser me gustas tú
user331 Y'ALL ARE NOT SLICK
user331 in fact, you're both so sick for playing with us like this
user774 we know you like the wind, we've seen your hair
user405 jajajaja
user607 okay, you might have nibbled with this a little
user775 jail!!! do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars
user379 what she said wasn't even that bad nor untrue
youruser now THIS is a view. tu as ta place au louvre avec toutes les autres grandes œuvres d'art. (you belong in the louvre with all the other great works of art)
charles_leclerc oh ! thank you, i am so normal about you and this comment
pierregasly great, now he's glitching and going crazy in the group chat again
user2 AGAIN?!?
alex_albon spoiler alert ⚠️ he was not normal about this
user125 who blames him? not me. instead, i am insanely jealous
user457 WHY ARE THEY BOTH BREAKING OUT INSANE LEVELS OF RIZZ?
user508 oh he's so fine🤤
user933 the matching captions and matching replies,,, god I'm NOT your strongest soldier
user36 yesss king, give us beach!!!!
user078 well, boat but yes!!!
user649 he said im speeding up the soft launch
user573 by 0.25x speed
user649 at least it's something?
user378 honestly i will take these crumbs instead of absolutely nothing
user269 i LOVE crumbs 🤤 mmhmm😋
user120 is really considered a soft launch when they make comments like THAT?
user801 someone sedate me, im unwell🤒
user903 he's trying to thirst trap us into ignoring the 4th slide
user754 well it's working😫
user028 charles!!! te amo 😘
user753 gnawing at the iron bars of my enclosure like a rat/mouse with a giant block of cheese
user136 One like and I'll drown myself.
user112 why did you like it🤨
user136 Damn Nessa, mind ur business😐, why did YOU🫵🏽 like it?
user388 them posting sea/boat pics on the same day? THEY'RE TOGETHER
user33 hear me out, it could be a coincidence
user388 *shakes you violently* HOW MANY COINCIDENCES DO YOU NEED
user770 i think we're focusing a little too much on the wrong thing here
user911 if i said what i was thinking, i'd be banned from this app.
user762 can't wait to see you at the next race! praying for a podium finish🙏!
user63 Who are you taking pictures of Charles???
user894 Gee that's a tough one/s
user720 he didn't really think we'd ignore the 4th slide
user402 i am here to do some good ole fashion SLUT shaming🗣️📢
user309 Love them trying to out-compliment each other
user61 he has such a gorgeous smile
user7 actual post of you and ﹫youruser when?
user633 nobody wants to see that
use105 speak for yourself
user708 😍😍
user808 i don't know who's luckier, her or him
user809 both, both is good
user007 hope you're having fun destroying my heart😭😭
user169 charles please, please, do you need a dog because i swear i can bark. in fact i am barking and drooling violently rn
user196 you really get me
user45 he's taking pictures of me y'all 🫶🏼
user502 🥵🔥
user19 you can do so much better than her, i promise
user67 i cried a little when i saw your post of her was still up
user64 I feel like a Victorian man™ seeing a woman's ankle for the first time 😵‍💫
user664 feeling like how teachers think boys feel when seeing a girl's shoulders
user325 don't forget to keep applying sunscreen!
user04 he's so pretty, i'm sick to my stomach.
user758 he tryna kill people i swear
user99 honestly, i think he looks so at peace/happy and i'm grateful for that
user74 you're honestly ruining my life by not being mine 😭😭😭
user981 that looks like too much food for 1 person
user523 that's because im with him🤗
user296 screaming, crying, throwing up, banging my head against the wall, wailing like a banshee.
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tagged: youruser
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charles_leclerc play all mine by brent faiyaz
View all 4 726 comments
user39 just fell to my knees in a Walmart
youruser this is not the soft launch we agreed on mon bijou
charles_leclerc just wanted to show you off mon ange
youruser oh !
user505 ALL MINE BY BRENT FAIYAZ!??!! oh it's really over 😭
landonorris can't even get picture creds for the 4th slide
user444 you didn't even get a reply 💀 everybody point 🫵🏼 and laugh
landonorris just looked at your bio and it says ln4, i really is your own fans😞
user528 can't believe she invented green 😮‍💨
user553 them in the photobooth, fuck, is it hot🥵🥵 in here orrr
youruser who is she???
charles_leclerc oh you know, just the love of my life
youruser kicking my feet, smiling SO hard right now. je t'aime, je t'aime, je t'aime.
charles_leclerc je t'aime encore plus mon ange❤️ (i love you even more my angel)
user378 The launch we've been waiting for
user957 the way they're looking at each other, parting my hair with a knife 🤪
youruser you're obsessed with me
charles_leclerc well, yes! am i not supposed to be??
user39 no shame in admitting it, i respect that🤷🏽‍♂️
user291 serving cunt like she got a master's degree in cuntology from servington universitea
user239 charles, can you fight because i feel like i'm gonna steal your girl
charles_leclerc ... you have five seconds to delete this🙂
user805 If I speak...
user806 charles would probably block you
user575 charlessss i can make you happier, trust me
youruser no, i don't think i will
user575 my bad girl, didn't think you'd see this.
maxverstappen1 you guys are so sickening, please get a room
charles_leclerc who even invited you???
youruser wow max, i thought you liked us
maxverstappen1 YOU DID
maxverstappen1 not enough to watch you both be so touchy sorry
yourbestfriend my stunning girl💚
charles_leclerc i think you mean, MY girl
yourbestfriend i'm not arguing with you, ﹫youruser please come get your man
youruser i think 'm gonna stay out of this...
user332 when will someone post me to my fav brent faiyaz song🫤
user333 manifesting getting posted to stay down 🕯️🙏🏾🕯️🙏🏾🕯️🙏🏾
user334 my wedding song frfr😩
user018 why did daddy's home start playing 🛐
user12 FINALLY
user618 is your girlfriend single?
charles_leclerc read that first part again for me
user466 KHCJTSURS 5HE HARED LAWNCH
user540 not one word spelt correctly, open the schools!!!
user843 who is cutting onions😭😭???
user785 HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LIVE MY DREAM
charles_leclerc feeling really blessed 🙏🏻
user912 this is so unserious 💀
user440 love love love 😘
user54 love a black woman from infinity to infinity!!!
user113 in the words of dove cameron, i could be a better boyfriend than him. trust🙏🏾
user53 NOOOO YN come back to meeee!!!
charles_leclerc i think she's good here, next to me
user17 can't breathe!!!
user17 hottest gf alive
user17 she looks too good i can't breathe 🫠
user27 showed this to my therapist and she's finally gonna let me kill myself
user065 to be shown off like this,,, i beg
pierregasly the fact that we were together in the last slide...
charles_leclerc but is this a friend group hard launch?
user513 call this hard launch an ugly twink the way it cannot be topped
use488 CALL IT WHAT NOW🎤🎤
user83 the wording is CRAZY
user48 not Charles beefing with everyone in love w his girl💀💀
user259 just bought a whole house with the 1st pic. her face card is insane
user613 kissin the screen😙
charles_leclerc kissing her👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻
youruser ok that's enough
user613 oooohhhh you got scolded 🫵
user6 LETS GO TO PARIS😋
user084 the audacity to use that emoji, ijbol
user40 i hate you
user40 i'm sorry that was jealousy speaking, so happy for you❤️
user069 i - no words
user675 charles, I heard she throws rocks at orphans
charles_leclerc i'm not an orphan but she can hit me😊
arthur_leclerc NO SHAME😭
youruser i do not throw rocks at children, ﹫charles_leclerc hi
user675 yeah, i lied but he's something...
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youruser think i like you best when you're just with me and no one else...
View all 4 662 comments
user73 didn't i say don't post your man 🥲
charles_leclerc who is that guy?
youruser he's just this guy i'm hopelessly in love with
charles_leclerc he's very lucky❤️
youruser we both are❤️
user23 we all know who it is girl🤣🤣🤣
charles_leclerc i can't believe you didn't post a single picture of me where my face is visible 😪
youruser i hate you, you know we agreed on the soft launch
charles_leclerc you hate me? so enemies to lovers😏
youruser 🤦🏾‍♀️
user704 she's so mean to him, what does he even see in her
user202 you know there's this thing called banter and he's a grown man who can make his own decisions?
user525 can't wait for the future videos of her at any of the grand prix races
user4 he's got a grip on you in every picture i've seen of y'all together so far, like chill lil bro, she's not gon run away🤣🤣🤣
user206 he's actually just like me bc if she was my girl...
yourbestfriend the best launch because we don't have to see his face
user180 ur so real ily
yourbestfriend jokes, but I'm happy for you both💚
youruser love you💚
user16 i'm so😭 happy😭 for you😭 both😭
user444 lover gyal era!
user407 must be nice to young, sexy and in love
youruser it really is🥰
user350 do y'all need a third, a dog, a maid, or anything really because i can do it all!
user110 shattered.
user12 feeling giddy asf like i'm the one who got posted😵‍💫
user61 you two look great together😊
youruser thank you aoife🤎
user61 you KNOW MY NE?$?$?_? SHE KNOWS MY NAME JEJEJEJ IM SCREAKING
user08 lord, i see what you've done for others 🙏🏼
user940 when will it be me.(with you)
charles_leclerc never, not even in the next thousand lifetimes 🤣
user838 CHARLES???
user839 OHMYDAYS?!?!
user516 the rope in my backyard looks so tempting
user133 I love k. so much
user48 feet? for free? in this economy?
lilymhe leave him for me, let's run away together💒
youruser packing my bags 🛍️
charles_leclerc ﹫alex_albon please come get your girlfriend
alex_albon lily... what is this
lilymhe as the saying goes, never let your boyfriend stop you from finding your wife
charles_leclerc NOT MY GIRLFRIEND THO
youruser boooo tomato tomato tomato i'm throwing tomatoes🍅🍅🍅
charles_leclerc mon ange???
user909 lily was cooking ♨️🍳
user102 remember everyone, he is NOT a mountain, he CAN be moved!
user00 Donatella VERSACE💜
user6 i love the eiffel tower
user315 because you're parisian, right????
user57 i don't think that's the reason💀💀
user510 do you want another boyfriend?
user204 i just think it really weird that you're not posting his face when he literally posted multiple pictures of you on his account, like what are you hiding?
user832 i think it's weird that you don't know how to mind your own business? like it's crazy that you think you're entitled to a reason. this is her account to do what she wants with it, even if she posted him, you'd complain. so please, just shut up.
user278 not my boyfriend having the audacity to steal my girlfriend from me🫤
user98 honestly if I looked like her, i would not know how to act
user122 facts
landonorris what is with you and your boyfriend not giving credit for pictures i take???
youruser this isn't about you right now🫶🏾
user444 at least you got a response this time
landonorris again, for someone who has ln4 in their bio, you sure like to bully me
user444 you think this is bullying? i can actually bully you if you want
landonorris no, i'm good👋🏻
user303 that one girl was right about you liking the wind a lil too much
user926 yeah this is cute and all but can i land this backflip off a cliff?
user376 those flowers are so pretty 🤍🎀
user401 driving home in the wrong lane tonight🤣
user527 the way i was right the whole time and now my friend owes me money 🥰
user830 you guys are such a cute couple
user010 this would have been such a good soft launch dump of we didn't see his hard launch 😅
youruser added to their story.
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user09 posting a man to MITSKI?! oh it's serious, ur actually down horrendous
yourbestfriend hard launching on ur story when you soft launched in a post is crazyyyy🤣🤣
youruser hard launching when i see a ring 🤗
nah, im kidding but if they want to see him, go to his profile🤷🏾‍♀️
yourbestfriend IKTR 💅🏾
user215 now my man's gonna expect me to post him on my story like this😑 but i forgive you queen 🙄
landonorris finally made it in a post!
youruser finally you can stop complaining 🫶🏾
landonorris why are you and charles so mean to me
youruser because you deserve it, hope this helps🙌🏾
francisca.cgomez double dating with you was so fun! can't wait to do it again 💞
youruser yes! gonna go bother charles to make plans for another one soon 😁
user121 the sun drawing around ur eyes🥲 crying, that's so effin cute
yourfriend not you being all sentimental with the daniel caesar song AND the puzzle pieces
youruser damn, can't even do something nice🧍🏾‍♀️ see if i post you again
yourfriend you're so dramatic pookie
user531 the bear and the flowerss, please where can i get man like that😖
user479 so many gorgeous girls🥰
user06 glad you're surrounding yourself with people who make you happy and bring out this lovely light 🤎
yourfriend2 when the plans finally make it out the group chat🙌🏾🎉
youruser love that for us🤧 but i swear getting stuck in that elevator made me reconsider all my decisions leading up to that moment
yourfriend2 the 1st hour wasn't that bad tho
yourfriend3 we will never be free🙁
youruser please shut up😭😭
yourfriend3 no bc you didn't listen when dr umar said "SNOW BUNNIES NEVA🙅🏾‍♀️❌"
youruser i do not see it🧘🏾‍♀️
𖦹 𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 𓂃 𖦹
⤷ end note ‧ ★ : halfway through making this i went "hmm, this should be a lando smau" but then i continued doing this. it posted like 5 times which freaked me out and was supposed to be done ages ago but yeah. also french is from deepl. enjoy.
810 notes · View notes
ebsmind · 1 year ago
Text
𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐯 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 ❀ tom blyth x fem!actress reader
summary : reader is tom’s gf and stars in the new A Good Girls Guide to Murder (book to tv adaptation) as Andie Bell
warnings : none besides reader playing a dead girl in a tv series
a/n : i can’t believe i caved…. BUT IDC THIS WAS SO FUN TO MAKE 😼
also everyone in the orginal casting for aggtm is the same (except andie ofc)
and ofc i just wanted to tag and say thank you to my fav people on here 🫶🏻 yall are one of the main reasons why i did this 💗 @ghostfacd @marvelsswansong @goosita @maysileeewrites i love yall!!!
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ynuser a + s ❤️
tagged : @/hojay92 & @/rahulpattni27
view all comments
tomblyth so proud of you my darling ❤️
↳ ynuser i love you
↳ user1 STOP I CANNOT
ememyers my fav dead girl 🫶🏻
↳ ynuser PLS PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK IM ACTUALLY DEAD
user1 ur literally the only one who could play andie
user2 slayed the house down houston i’m deceased
user3 please tell me you read the series before auditioning
↳ ynuser yup i did 😼
↳ tomblyth you’re such a bookworm 🙃
user4 PLS TOM CALLING HER A BOOKWORM THEY’RE SO CUTEEEE
rahulpattni27 the andie to my sal 🖤
↳ ynuser always 🤍
hojay92 MY BABIES
❤️ by creator
user5 pls if i was tom i would be weary of y/n and rahul bc they’re a little too friendly
↳ user6 u need to chill they are literally costars who play each others love interests
rachelzegler gonna read the books just so i can watch this show
↳ ynuser rachel in her bookworm era??
user7 slay
user8 MOTHERRRRR
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tomblyth quick trip to paris with lovie
tagged : @/ynuser
view all comments
ynuser you make me so happy
↳ tomblyth and you make me the happiest man alive
↳ user1 pls i want what they have
ynuser also can we pls talk about how happy i was to see the eiffel tower 😭😭
↳ user2 the video he posted of you squealing when the tower shimmered 🥺
user3 can y/n fight? bc the all black fit is doing something to me
↳ ynuser my mom made me take karate when i was 7
↳ user3 OHHHH?????
user4 god i love my parents
rachelzegler where was my invite???
↳ joshandresrivera leave the love birds alone babe
❤️ by creator
user5 rachel just like me fr
user6 tom NEEDS to put a ring on it before i do
rachelzegler just posted on their story!
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ynuser trailer for aggtm is out now!! go watch it 🤍🕵🏻‍♀️
tagged : @/ememyers & @/hojay92
view all comments
ememyers 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻
❤️ by creator
user1 BRO THE TRAILER IS SOOOO GOOD I CANT WAIT!!!
user2 y/n was born to play andie
tomblyth so incredibly proud of you!! you killed it ❤️
↳ rahulpattni27 she truly did!!!
↳ ynuser awwww thank you guys!!! i love you both 🤍
user3 tom and rahul interacting??? oh my
user4 SLAY
rahulpattni27 ❤️❤️❤️
❤️ by creator
holjay92 my baby!!! the perfect andie 🥺
↳ ynuser momma!!! ily
user5 holly 🤝🏼 supporting all of her kids
user6 just by the looks of the trailer this show is gonna be SO GOOD
oliviarodrigo can’t wait to watch!!! i miss you
↳ ynuser i miss you more!!
user7 tom being so supportive >>>
rachelzegler you played the best dead girl there could ever be
↳ ynuser bae ily 💗💗
↳ tomblyth ummm what about me???
568 notes · View notes
m4tthewmurd0ck · 11 months ago
Text
Tom Blyth x Actress!Reader
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i try to avoid descriptors but i do use she/her, mention being shorter than tom and reader is a swiftie! click [HERE] for my tom blyth masterlist :)
the beginning of everything 🩵
*ALSO* speak now (taylor’s version) was released on july 7, 2023 but for my story it’s june 7, 2022 because we only support taylor’s version in this house
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june 7, 2022
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liked by username and others…
yourname enchanted (taylor’s version) 4:13 - 4:36. also no one is prouder of mother than i. she has my whole heart fr
username excuse me???
username whoooooo?!?
↳ username who what
↳ username i think they’re asking who the caption is about. because of the time stamps.
username i’m lazy can someone tell me what the lyrics are
↳ yournamefans “these are the words i held back as i was leaving too soon / i was enchanted to meet you / please don’t be in love with someone else / please don’t have somebody waiting on you”
rachelzegler 🥰 i ship iiiiittt!!!
↳ yourname shhh not so loud hasmzjejiajef
taylorswift meredith said if you don’t tell me who you’re talking about she’s going to be extremely upset. also hi i love you and you totally have my whole heart 💜
↳ taylorswift but tell me. i mean her.
↳ yourname i’m crying right now 😭 but also of course i’ll tell u anything for you my queen
joshandresrivera 🙊
↳ yourname and the monkey’s mouth better stay closed 🙃🙃🙃
ewanmitchell ooooooooooooooo
↳ yourname juliette is gonna put poison in aemonds drink istg
↳ username house of the dragon isn’t even released yet and we’re already witnessing a lovers spat!
↳ username wait is she dating ewan?
↳ username no but ewan plays aemond targaryen and yourname plays juliette atlas. they’re together in the book at least
tchalamet je sais qui 😄 (i know who)
↳ yourname je vais te tuer 🤭 (i’m going to kill you)
tomblyth liked this photo
tomblyth followed yourname
yourname followed tomblyth
~ 2 weeks later ~
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liked by joshandresrivera and others…
tomblyth by the way, i was enchanted to meet you too ♥️
username i’m crying????
username i’m going to die alone.
↳ username heavy on that for me too 😭
username soft launch!!
↳ username more like hard af launch. this is obviously referring to yourname post a couple of weeks ago which means her crush was mutuaaaaal
yourname ♥️
username WAIT that means they’re gonna be in a movie together???
↳ username do your hands hurt from all that reaching 😳
↳ yournamefans i think they’re right. tomblyth and rachelzegler were already announced to play lucy gray baird and coriolanus snow. they were then seen with joshandresrivera and yourname on june 7. that wasn’t a double date based on their captions, so it was possibly a meet / hang out with your co-stars thing? they haven’t known josh and rachel that long so that’s my guess.
rachelzegler i’m screaming! i knew you guys would be perfect together 😍
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If you’d like to be tagged for future Tom x Actress!Reader, let me know! if you’ve already asked to be tagged and don’t see your username, it means I wasn’t able to tag you.
TAGLIST — @daenerysqueenofhearts | @coconut-dreamz | @spencerstits | @callsignwidow | @inf4ntdeath | @upsidedownjill | @toeoffrog | @bada-lee-ily | @sassyangel16 | @or-was-it-just-a-dream | @jolleluvsyou | @ennycutie | @ashcosmo | @urfavnoirette | @nomorespahgetti | @a-mysterious-potato
364 notes · View notes
agentjazzy · 1 year ago
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The Evil Dead Dashboard Simulator
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🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow
YES I got my girlfriend a pretty pretty necklace from a gumball machine and when she sees it she's going to give me so so many kisses :)
(411 Notes)
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🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow
man, fuck tourists, I was heading to my spot when a car came up and honked at us, all friendly like, so me and buddy waved bc there wasn't anyone else there, but then they YELLED at us???? we were just walking?? wtf did we even DO
#i hope the bridge collapses i hope they all DIE #vent
(4,079 Notes)
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🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow
unethical life pro tip: if you overhear your professor talking about their family cabin that they have, and they have open office hours posted, it's your RIGHT to go check that shit out
they're not gonna be there!! they have papers to grade and other shit to deal with!!! free cabin!!!
🌋 thehillsalsohaveanniceass 📛 Follow
op what are you going to do when you roll up and they're just sitting there
🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow
lmao his ass is NOT going to be in that cabin 😂 he just got back from a vacation with his family or something (dipshit couldn't wait until break) he's supposed to be at his office and he does NOT have the vacation days to be leaving so soon
(151 Notes)
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🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow
fml my older brother asked if I wanted to tag along on a trip to a cabin and I said sure bc it beats staying at home w/ dad
BUT IT'S A COUPLE TRIP
HE'S BRINGING HIS COWORKER/GIRLFRIEND THAT HE DOESN'T SHUT UP ABOUT, HIS FRIEND IS BRINGING HIS GIRLFRIEND, WHYYYY DID THEY INVITE ME
#if i knew i would've said no 😭 #he didn't even invite his Actual best friend #which SUCKS bc then we could've fooled around when no one was paying attention #huh who said that 😳 #cheryl posting
(4 Notes)
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📜 anthroapologist 🦀 Follow
haters will hear you scurrying underneath the bowels of your home and freak out like HELLO where else am I supposed to scurry????
(1,288 Notes)
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🔮 shessellingseashells Follow
you ever feel like people Immediately forget your name upon meeting you :(
#i might be too high but i don't think any of these people know my full name #i mean I'm Definitely high #and tried moonshine for the first time #but like. really feeling like an outsider rn
(0 Notes)
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🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow
it's so hard being the only chad amongst nerds, like, I GET IT, you're too much of a pussy to investigate the creepy fucking cellar, the LEAST you can do is let me listen to the tapes I found down there, they're cool as fuck
🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow
okay and now they're all yelling at me bc a stupid tree broke a window right when the tape got good 😑
🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow
fuck it, here's a recording of the tape, I hope none of you guys are cowards like all my friends apparently are, have fun bc I can't
(206,089 Notes)
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💀 theevilacrosstheland Follow
when someone plays your song you can feel that shit in your SOUL catch me coming towards you at 15mph awoken from my eternal slumber if I hear that first note fr
(6,282 Notes)
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🔍 peachycraftsection Follow
my boyfriend spent $14 in quarters attempting to get a magnifying glass necklace from one of those gumball machine toy capsules at work bc he knows I LOVE mysteries and detective stories and I need to [redacted] him in the [redacted] right NOW 💖💖💖
(432 Notes)
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🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow
everyone's making out rn which is REAL inconvenient bc there is Absolutely Something Outside
🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow
should I check it out
🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow
there's no one online to tell me no so.....
📝 charcoalfingertips Follow
op you haven't posted in an hour are you okay???
🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow
I'm Irrevocably Changed Now 👍
(104 Notes)
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🌹 deadite420 Follow
I'm just a silly goofy guy if I happened to have killed and maimed and bite and stab that's just who I am and how I show love ^_^
(5,724 Notes)
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🔮 deadite68 Follow
coyotes are SO right, if youre trapped somewhere or someone grabs ya, just bite your limb off, no hesitation, show superiority, it's not like THEY'RE gonna do it
(2,051 Notes)
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🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow
whhy is there so muchh blood everywhere........
#help #i accidentally kept my mouthh open and blood got in it :((((( #my head hurts sso bad bookcases kept falling on me
(5 Notes)
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🔩 deadite883 Follow
heehee i love crawling through pipes and electrical outlets
(207 Notes)
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🎶 8tracksarebetterthancassettes Follow
I logged onto Tumblr and wtf why am I following so many people with deadite in their username? is it a reference? did I miss a meme? are we mishapocolypse-ing again?
🌿 dirtissoyummy Follow
I think it might be a virus transmitted by bots but idk I'm too scared to interact
🤡 thespareshemp Follow
okay I investigated to see if it was a bot swarm or people having fun SO
for the first cluster of blogs, all their IPs are logging from the same location, which usually means a lazy bot swarm BUT I went through all their archives and most of them, before changing urls, interacted with one another naturally and stuff, @-ing one another and junk, and they seem to know each other irl
so it's just friends having fun!! and then people joining in on the fun!! feel free to reblog without fear!
#they're all still posting original content so that's kinda a giveaway #even though it's all 'deadite'fied and all #i wonder if theyre doing an arg thing
(1,004 Notes)
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🔍 deadite81 Follow
when men are SOAKED with blood 👌😍🥰😘💖🥰🥰💖😍👌😘😘😘💖💖😍
(20,983 Notes)
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🤡 deadite6091 Follow
JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOHN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US
🛏 honkshoomimi Follow
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🤡 deadite6091 Follow
You Will Be Dead By Dawn
(5,732 Notes)
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🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow
man, fuck tourists, I was heading to my spot when a car came up and honked at us, all friendly like, so me and buddy waved bc there wasn't anyone else there, but then they YELLED at us???? we were just walking?? wtf did we even DO
🥐 evilpillsburydoughboy Follow
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hey you live near the state line right? can you check the news real quick
🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow
uhhhhhhhhh
🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow
WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE BRIDGE IS GONE
🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow
fml if any of you need me i'm going to lay down in the cold and let the forest take me
(4,079 Notes)
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🛏 deadite7390 Follow
if you were to break me down to my pure essence you would be left with pure, unfiltered evil
also grits
mmmmmm grits
(2,561 Notes)
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🎥 deadite3023 Follow
falling down the stairs is the most efficient way to go down them :)
(941 Notes)
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🎲 deadite69 Follow
y'all ever open the window and AUGH OUGH UGH UGH UGH AAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAA THE AGONIES and then you adjust to the sunlight and you're fine
(8,091 Notes)
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🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SOMEONE HELP ME
(3 Notes)
256 notes · View notes
oh-no-its-bird · 3 months ago
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TORA AU TIME YES ITS THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN !!!
Ok so first, quoting this from a previous tora au post:
Personal take here: I don't think Itachi likes being in charge! That boy is a born, built, and bred shinobi who follows what he is told to a perfect T, no matter how blatantly horrifically awful the order is! Even if hates it with all of his heart! He'll still fucking do it! And then only blame himself for it and not the guy who fucking ordered it! Because he'll still obey that guy after! Which also adds another fun layer of irony bc hes supposed to be clan head one day! To me, Itachi is a fascinating subject of having an unshakable, unbreakable iron will— and also having absoloutley no spine To be fair tho was also like. Fuckin 13. He was fucked up and was tricked at a very, very young age and unfortunatley that one mistake came to chain him to that one specific way of thinking. If he came to grow out of that way of thinking, he'd first have to admit he'd made a mistake, which wasn't gonna happen bc it was too late for regrets. But anyways: With Tora here Itachi has another "voice of reason" to help steer him away from other voices who might otherwise bind him. There isn't as much pressure on only him + Shisui to here and now choose what they (and only they) will choose to do to save the entire clan or Konoha Tora is a natural leader and quick to take charge, and Itachi is ok with that. When Itachi chooses to speak, he is listened to carefully and his opinions are taken seriously, which is all he can ask for tbh. Otherwise he's allowed to sit there and look pretty till given a nice, neatly wrapped plan approved by 2 people he can really, truly trust. So he's doing a bit better mentally than canon Anyways, in this AU I think Itachi should actually get to semi-retire as a shinobi and actually Sasuke gets to be clan head bc his brother ain't built for it. Plus it can play more into the stuff I was talking ab earlier about Sasuke struggling a lot more than those around him to learn different stuff (sealing especially) only to come out as one of the most terrifying in what he eventually masters. Let the second son inherit!! Let Sasuke have a defining character moment where he decides he wants to help guide the clan, and he's forced to kind of get over his brother worship to confront Itachi to say he doesn't think he'd make the best clan head. And Itachi let's out this sigh of relief he did not know he has been holding for his entire life and tells Sasuke he's proud of him.
With that in mind ^
I think the ultimate ironic pairing for the finale of the Tora AU would be Tora and Itachi ending up together, but with Itachi as the retired ninja housewife and Tora the big boi breadwinner
The ultimate fuck you twist call back to all Tora's parents talk of Tora needing to find a "good man to take care of you" + irony from them originally cheering Tora on when they learned he and itachi were friends bc they thought he'd snag him as a husband and the culmination of Itachi's "I don't really want to be in charge actually" arc
I love a full circle !!
Sasuke is Itachi's best man and Shisui is Tora's and Kakashi gets to walk Tora down the isle instead of his parents who he has no real attachment to
Actually POV I fucking kill off the Haruno's and Tora and Sakura have to deal w the death of their parents, who they both had very complicated relationships with but relationships nonetheless
Mmm I kinda like that, putting that in my back pocket for now
I honestly don't even know how the romance would happen, tbh I'm not the biggest romance fan but I just love the progression of it in the narrative. I think it'd be a cool end to their story, I'll sweat the little details later
Maybe they aren't even in love fr fr
Oh my god wait no hear me out
HEAR ME OUT
Itachi getting out of being clan head via marrying Tora. Don't ask me how this works. They aren't even like in love or anything but Itachi is using Tora as a political shield to fuck off and enjoy his housewife retirement actually.
Tora is similarly using this for one of his infamous political plots somehow, it's all part of his master plan and as usual itachi is just happy to go along for the ride
,,,the perfect queer platonic besties end to their arc ,, I love it this is my new ideal endgame
Sasuke drops that he's gonna fight Itachi to be clan head and Itachi one ups him by going "oh cool. Guess I don't need to marry Tora then."
Queue Sasuke spit take "You don't need to WHAT"
"Yeah we were gonna get married as part of a 10 step plan to help Tora take over the clan council + get me out of being clan head by abusing some old laws Tora found."
"??????????"
"I guess I'll tell Tora we don't need to do it anymore. I'm happy for you, little brother."
"???????????????????"
Anyways yeah, thinking ab tora au again.
I just finished re-reading my vault fic chapter for it and am having Thoughts(tm)
51 notes · View notes
yippeeometer · 1 month ago
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Yippeeometer, Im gonna need those Mass headcanons please and thank you
IVE WAITED YEARS FR THIS DAY!!!!!! MASSHOLES RISEEE!!!!!!!! WE MAY NEVER SEE OUR FAMILIES FOR BOSTON TRAFFIC GODDAMNIT BUT WE ARE PROUD!!!!!!!
incapable of normalcy and i truly mean that.
look theres a very specific vibe to mass and its 'will call in a bomb threat to get himself out of doing stuff he hates'
I HATE HIMMMM
so insane he's beyond dark humor atp that man grew up with puritans trying to convince him nothing was fun and now makes ass jokes for a living. what a 180.
oh and hes irritatingly cool even though hes such a dick. he's got big beautiful eyes and youre laughing along even though hes absolutely mocking u.
sports arent just sports its his way of life. which is why he wants to DIE because the red sox SUCK BALLS
sat there like a renaissance painting of despair in a dark room as the red sox fumble another game. phone illuminated w/ ny and nj sending him videos of the play with the sound of their laughter pasted on top.
'jock mass' 'nerd mass' get real he would be that one guy on the school newspaper that gets banned within the week for posting articles that are wayyyyy too radical to be necessary
he's be a journalist i fear. i fear he turns up to ur press conference and tears instantly spring to ur eyes bc hes got this shiteating grin that just says hes going to drag yours and your grandmothers name through the mud.
yk what i dont even fear. i am PROUD. no better job for a petty hoe than to write thinly veiled insults all day everyday.
sat there cackling into his computer describing one of maine's books as 'so bad its become a hatecrime to a group that doesnt exist' whilst maine actively tries to throttle him
hes such a MESSY BITCH INSTIGATOR. killing him with a rock until he's dead.
i could go on and on and i shall. man collects degrees, but not for fun as we may presume. its to win arguments against people so he can just casually pull out 'as someone w a phd-'
ok sue me he and rado would be great together. bc mass the type of guy to need to be the most impressive person in the room and anythig's impressive when youre stoned. rado sat there gasping in shock as he ties his shoelaces. gay.
if theres one mental image i have of him its that he claims that coats are for pussies to piss of ny and then spends the next 100 years only wearing t shirts and jeans. catches hypothermia 10 billion times. virginia interrogated daily for his taste in men.
ok furthermore and he cant drive. have u ever been to boston. its like a fucking psa on how to die most efficently.
30 notes · View notes
spideyladman · 10 months ago
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Imagine if ponies in My Little Pony did Timblr posts, I just know it would be chaotic as hell lmfao 😭😭😭
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🎉lifeoftheparty
I'm thinking about either adding glitter or sparkles to my cake, what do you guys think? :3
🍎applefarm
Sugarsweet, you could die from that
🎉lifeoftheparty
Festive!!! 🎉🎉🎉
350 notes
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🕶trendingtrends--deactivated
Do you guys think that Twilight Sparkle could've blackmailed Celestia into getting the wings? I mean, come on! How does that even work? How does a unicorn get wings? Unless there was some blackmailing I don't believe that she could've gotten them naturally
💎rarityonthedime
Well you shouldn't assume things! Though it was sudden finding out that she could get wings, it is entirely possible that through the magic of friendship, anything can happen, somehow!
🕶trendingtrends--deactivated
Okay I'm gonna be nice to you because you're a mare, but don't you think you should be working instead of thinking?
💎rarityonthedime
I'm not going to be nice to you, and as my little sister would say, L+bozo+your mother never loved you+you failed school+you have not paid attention to lessons+even I have more thinking capabilities than you could ever imagine+please think before you post+KYS (Keep Yourself Safe) because I will find you
🌩the-coolest-pony-in-town
Girl you killed him you found him fr
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🌟princess-of-friendship
Can someone check on @plant-and-animals for a moment? Flurry Heart just blew up the microwave again and Celestia added crow skulls to the water supplies and she's now in the hospital
🛡royalguardcaptainofficial
Literally nothing could've prepared me for that sentence
100,798 notes
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🐇plant-and-animals
Whoever is making that noise I swear to fuck if you don't turn down that noise I will find you I am trying to sleep I swear to fuck
🐇plant-and-animals
Turns out it was Angel, I am so sorry sweetie 🥺
23 notes
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🐉discord-of-all-trades
Phew! Thank Celestia (can'tbelieveI'msayingthat-) that I managed to pin the trouble on that angry rabbit! Now I've got to make sure to silence my game
🐉discord-of-all-trades
Wait. Fluttershy follows this account.
🌩the-coolest-pony-in-town
Oh you're dead for sure
🐉discord-of-all-trades
I JUST DELETED THIS POST WHAT THE HELL WHY ARE YOU REBLOGGING IT
🌩the-coolest-pony-in-town
Why not? :3
456 notes
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🍏flim-brother
Who exploded the machine.
🍎applefarm
Oh I don't know, WHO put a crow skull in MY farm's water supply?
🍏flim-brother
WHAT. OH MY CELESTIA ARE YOU OKAY???????????
🍎applefarm
Wait that wasn't you, you con-brother?
🍏flim-brother
NO??????????? JUST 'CAUSE WE'RE ENEMIES IT DOESN'T MEAN I WOULD DO THAT TO YOU. AND I JUST CHECKED MY BROTHER HE JUST WOKE UP FROM HIS NAP AND DIDN'T DO ANYTHING EITHER
🍎applefarm
. Huh.
🍏flim-brother
Wait did you blow up the machine???
🍎applefarm
. I'll pay for the damage
🍏flim-brother
Deal, in exchange of me helping you whoever in the world put that skull inside of your water supply, what is their problem??????
Update: Celestia did it. I fell into a well after she accidentally (hopefully) threw me so that I couldn't be in her way while she was running from the hospital. I have a pet frog now
🍎applefarm
He has a pet frog now, can confirm
6,789 notes
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🎉lifeoftheparty
Okay who in Celestia put a crow's skull in my tea today? It's not a very good prank :(
🍎applefarm
I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE EXPERIENCING THIS. WHAT IN TARNATION IS GOING ON???
567 notes
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🌌luna-the-sneeler
What is Celestia doing she just jumped out the window
🌌luna-the-sneeler
Girl what did you do.
🌟princess-of-friendship
What happened? What could've happened that would've led to her jumping out the window?!
🌟princess-of-friendship
Girl what did you do.
17,098 notes
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��of-course-its-not-celestias-account
I just threw skulls into the water supply, the weed has affected me
🌌luna-the-sneeler
Gurl what the fuck kinda weed are you smoking weed does not make you do that
🚀of-course-its-not-celestias-account
Nuh-uh
🌌luna-the-sneeler
Fym nuh-uh???
🌌luna-the-sneeler
She just told me that she tried to jump out the window to avoid responsibility of paying. She's still gonna pay tho, but I think she's gonna do it again
🧀secondlifeoftheparty
I'm calling the police
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🐲true--dragon
Am I a furry?
#<:^
5 notes
105 notes · View notes
moochalove · 1 year ago
Text
Last Nights Mistakes and New Beginnings (Part 4-5)(Final)
(yandere!kazuha x pregnant!reader x scaramouche)
Did you know they call me the yappinator? Anyways i’ve been meaning to finish it but i’ve been busy w school but now i have the time so i will be yapping away more (posting a little more)🗣️ Get cozy bcs this is long asf!
Reader is bi-icon! (+ trauma) If imma be fr, the beginning is a little off bcs i wrote it weeks ago (im lazy and i will not fix it🥶) ANYWAYS ILL STOP YAPPING! TY FOR READING 🤭 (if u do😡)
word count: Pretty fucking long ❤️
proofread: HELL NO! 😋 fill in the gaps/mistakes for me pls🫶
TW: Stockholm syndrome
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Arriving at the mall you think about making a break for it but these heels prevent you from doing so. With enough for the heel would surely snap though… Noted. Reaching for the door handle you’re stopped and pulled into a kiss. It’s a little uncomfortable but you play it off with a smile, “Don’t worry Kazu, I’m not gonna run off~” “I know darling, but this is the start of our new life so allow me to take the lead. Don’t worry your pretty mind about anything.” With that, he places one last peck onto your face. Once again, he is opening the door for you and you guiding you to the some shops. Immediately you notice his firm grip on your waist, and it’s uncomfortable. He said you would be buying clothes but you now realize he meant he was picking clothes FOR you. You’re in the dressing room and he has you trying on all these cute coquette clothing. It feels a little uncomfortable but you try to get used to the feeling of the outfits. Some are loose, and some are tighter. In your mind, you already knew which ones you liked based on the texture, design, etc..
Whenever you came out to show off an outfit you felt like a real couple. Showing off your outfit and making comments, no matter what you wore he seemed to agree it looked good on you, even if you didn’t think so. Something feels wrong about this but you can’t help but smile when he looks at you so adoringly.
You guys go to about three more shops, all of them having a different theme. By the time you were done, it was mid-afternoon. Both of your feet were killing you… not to mention you were hungry… You both agree to stop and get something to eat.
You arrive at a very familiar restaurant… Weren’t you just here? When was that though? If it was important surely you’d remember!
Scaramouche was frantic, to say the least. You weren’t answering his messages… Has something happened? He needs to get to you asap, but how? What if you’ve been removed from your home? If it came to it he could ask his mother to track you down, since she had that kind of power.
Knocking on the door he’s anxious, and hoping he would be met with a bright smile and worried hushing telling him that you were okay. After about a minute he knocks on your room window… No reply. Should he wait around? No, that’ll take too long. After some contemplation, he decides to reach out to his mom.
They have a long talk before she eventually caves. It feels like it’s been forever since she’s seen her child and when he comes back he’s on an adventure trying to get his girlfriend back. She didn’t think situations like that existed but he’s shown her the possibilities are endless. The way he talked about you so dearly gave her the impression you were a thing. Since she’s such a good and caring mother, it’s the least she can do for her future daughter!
Maybe he should’ve emphasized that you were just friends even though he wished for more
From what some super normal and not shady people told him, you were last seen at that restaurant you both had visited yesterday. Why were you there? That didn’t matter right now! Furrowing his eyebrows he sat there and thought long and hard. How was he going to get to you? Kazuha would most likely be glued to your side so directly approaching was out of the question. Could he signal you to him from afar? No, that probably won’t work… Pounding his forehead slightly he couldn’t form a good plan.
“You seem troubled, Doll.” A sly finger guided itself through his short purple locks.
“What do you want, Miko? I’m busy and-“
“You know it’s nice to run away then come running back when you need help. Your mother was on edge for weeks. Spending whatever free time she had looking for her poor child. Always looking for you despite her own needs.”
“Did you come to ask me what’s wrong only to turn around and try to guilt trip me? You don’t change, do you?”
Without saying anything she placed a bag next to him and then made her way to the door. Peeking through the bad he looked back to her fleeting figure before shouting out, “Wait! What is this for? You really expect me to forgive you with this bag full of clothes?! Plus, this has girl stuff in it anyways-“ “Silly Kuni! This is to help you get your girl back!” “Excuse me?!” Miko sighed while shrugging, “And you say your moms are no help! C'mon, you have to think outside the box, silly!” Taking the bag back she pulled out the cutest dress you’ve ever seen along with tights and heels. “It’d be stupid to approach her directly. You have no idea what kind of mental state she’s in, she may not trust any other man or claim she’s fine with her captor.” Digging deeper into the bag she pulled out a long wig that happened to be the same shade as his own hair, “So you have to coax her out as someone willing to understand and help her out of the situation!” Before he knew it he was all dolled up, shifting uncomfortably in the dress and trying to adjust his posture and his footing, constantly brushing his much longer locks back while puckering and rolling his lips that had a gloss applied to them. Would this really work?
“Miko, I don’t think this is gonna work… I don’t make a very convincing girl….” he awkwardly fussed with his bangs before glancing over at her. Miko held her phone up and with a click and a flash the very image of… whatever this was… saved onto her phone and probably being backed up to her cloud. “Oh, you look just like your sister!” Placing her phone back in her bag she shooed him out of the car before, then rolled down the window offering a few words, courtesy of her never-ending-kindness! “Just be kind to her, her heart will surely realize who you are... Or don’t! Maybe she’ll see through all of this!” Scaramouche could only grit his teeth as she motioned her hand at him. “I’ll be waiting here so once she comes to her senses I won’t be far. Plus! Wouldn’t want you to try and be all hero-like only to trip and fall in those cuttteee heels of yours!”
Spoonful after spoonful you swallowed whatever food had been shoved into your face. Were you even hungry? Not that it matters. At this point, you’ve come to treat this as if it were a real date! Yet your heart doesn’t skip a beat when he cups your face. A couple of people do glance over at you both awkwardly but that smile of yours tells them you’re just a young couple in love. It goes on like this for a few more minutes before beautiful swaying locks catch your eye, it’s true you’ve been ignoring the faces of those who’ve been passing by, but this face is stunning. Your heart skips a beat when your eyes meet each other. Now something about all this feels familiar but you can’t quite pin it down just yet. Kazuha notices how your attention is drawn away from him and he immediately pulls your chin towards him, “Is something the matter my love? You seem distracted.” He bluntly states as his eyebrows furrow slightly in frustration. “A-ah, no, I just…” Perhaps you were scared or maybe still stunned by that girls beauty but you can’t seem to form a coherent thought. He shifts around in his seat a little, ever so slightly moving his chair to block your view of the girl. With a short ‘ahem’ you brush it off as just seeing someone you thought you recognized.
If you look past his intense gaze you can still kinda see her fussing with her long hair. A waiter shows her to her table that so happens to be next to yours. You bite your tongue to hide a giggle when you see her awkwardly try to walk in heels, maybe she’s not used to them? Once she sits down it’s obvious she’s not used to wearing such feminine clothes, the way she keeps lifting her feet off the ground and sliding them farther out, or how she pulls the hem of her dress down even though it’s past her knees. The way she covered her mouth and spoke in a quiet meek voice told you maybe she was shy. Kazuha glanced at you both, almost trying to understand the connection you guys had but signed in defeat, “I’m gonna use the restroom then pay for our food. Don’t go anywhere.” And with that, he was gone but surely it wouldn’t take him long to be back.
Scaramouche had to be quick about this. The least he could do is get you outside.
Trying to keep his ladylike demeanor he tried starting the conversation with something normal. Of course, this meant he would have to speak a little louder in order for you to hear in the louder environment. He would be lying to himself if he said he hadn’t “practiced” his female voice.
“Isn’t the food here the best?”
Taken aback by how cute she sounded you cover your mouth slightly. “She even has a cute voice!”, you thought to yourself. Once again stunned you take a moment to respond.
“Y-yeah!” your response is a little fast-paced but she just smiles in response. “Haha, you seem a little nervous, what, too stunned by my looks?” Even though he was supposed to be portraying a meek, innocent girl, he couldn’t help but still be cocky. It’s as if you were on autopilot with the way your response was the same yeah…
Part of you felt like that’s something he would say. Who was he again?
“It’s a little stuffy in here, don’t you agree? How about we get some fresh air?” The girl suggested so innocently that you’d completely “forgotten” what Kazuha told you NOT to do. As if you’d been under a spell you followed a girl you didn’t even know the name of out of the restaurant. Her name! You need her name! This can’t be the last time you see each other you need her contact info! You reach to where you would normally keep your phone only for your attention to be stolen away by her.
She handed you her phone that had a picture of a very certain cat. Your heart fastens as you start to recall some things, you couldn’t submit to someone who only half-loved you. No, you had to get home to your first baby. Tears threaten to spill as everything comes back faster than you can comprehend.
He didn’t love you, no, he never did. If he did he would’ve stayed the first night. He was just looking for something to sedate his own woes. You come to the realization that your delusions you made up to protect yourself were false. You haven’t been in love for years like your mind had told you, you don’t know what he really feels, you just filled in the blanks with lies your mind fed you. In reality, you’ve probably only really known each other for a couple of days, during those 4 months you spent pregnant and alone your brain spun a story as if you were real lovers. Hating yourself could come later but for now, you need to get a grip and get out of here. Suddenly you’re caught up to speed and all it feels like you’re gonna vomit, your clothes feel tighter and you can feel your own skin, every pore feels open and you hate every second of it. What feels like hours is only a matter of seconds.
A hand is gently wipes your tears away,
“It’s time to go, Y/n.”
“I cant.. I’m sacred. I-“
“Don’t be. I'm here now, and I’m not letting you go.” He looked so serious, although a little funny since he was still in his getup.
Reaching for your wrist he gently and slowly led you farther away from the establishment and closer to your getaway car.
Both of your steps got faster and faster. You didn’t want to look back, no, you shouldn’t.
A voice you’ve come to hate shouts out to you. Ears pound loudly and your heart skips several beats when you hear fastened footsteps approaching. A wave of pain crashes onto you when your lower back aches in pain. You stop even though you don’t want to and clutch your stomach in retaliation.
You have to move right now otherwise he’ll catch up. Scaramouche turns back around for you and effortlessly picks you up and carries you to the car. When he turned to place you in the car he’s sure Kazuha has seen his face. Crap… Not like it mattered right now. He rushes to the other side of the car but is pulled back by a hand that is placed on his back, it’s cold and uncomfortable. Almost as if it triggered something in him he shouts and pushes him back into the ground.
Once Scaramouche is in the car Miko doesn’t hesitate to slam on the gas pedal and get you both somewhere safe.
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Final Part:
When you wake up you’re in a very comfy bed. Moving your legs a little you wince uncontrollably. Memories come flooding back and your eyes dart to where Scaramouche is sitting. A smile makes itself known on your face and you reach out to him. He melts into your touch but avoids looking at you. You know you messed up big time by not running away from Kazuha like you should have… But you were in a deranged state! Surely he won’t blame you completely. Breaking the silence you ask him what’s wrong.
“I know we kinda just met but I hope you know I love you…” he trailed off, still avoiding eye contact. “I always have… It’s a shame you don’t remember me. If you did then I guess you could technically say we didn't just meet.”
Huh? You two knew each other? Maybe he’s got the wrong person. Innocently you ask, “Have we met somewhere before? I’m sorry but I don’t seem to ever recall-“ “Just take a good look at me and try to recall. We used to be playmates when we were little. Your parents were busy like mine so they would drop us off at that one daycare.” Your eyes squint as you take a good look at him, “And we went to school together for a little while- I tried stealing your pen-“ Eyes widening you can’t help but burst out laughing.
Now you remember him!
“It’s you! I- How could I forget? Oh my gosh, it seems work has made me forget my younger days!” Covering your mouth to hide a smile you can’t help but laugh a little louder. His face seems upset but eventually melts into a smiling one along with you. For a couple of moments you both laugh and exchange playful banter. Everything in the world is right at that moment.
But once again, your mistakes will catch up with you.
After the laughing dies down he squeezes your hand and places a handle on your stomach. This causes you to shift uncomfortably but you try to play it off as a cramp.
“When the Doctor came to relay your status he told me one bit of information that… you probably didn’t want me to know.”
Oh shit. Oh shit- Your heart fastens and you try to muster out a response but it hitches in your throat. “I-I canexplain p-please let me-“You fumble your words and tears pool up in your eyes.
With an affirmative squeeze to your hand he smiles softly, “It’s okay.”
“But it’s not- I messed up and now-“ You covered face with your hand, attempting to hide yourself away from him.
“And now- we can work this out, together. I promise I will do my best to be a good parent. If you’d just give me a chance- A chance to take care of you and your child. I would do anything to be with you once and for all. Please, Y/n, don’t leave me again.” His hand came up to yours pressed against your face, and slowly removed it from you.
A part of you feels raw, and exposed, yet, this time it’s different. Part of your brain tells you to run from his affection but the other part feels so defeated that you just want to cry into his chest and beg him to stay with you. Lucky for you he was willing to stay with you. Even if you were going to have your kidnapper's baby. Leaning into him you cried out all your sorrows that had been bottled up for the past couple of months. All he could do was rub your back and listen to you cry your heart out.
It felt good to finally tell someone how you truly felt. How much has been troubling you? Although you’re sure if you were to tell this to a professional you’d been locked up….
After you’re done crying you wipe your tears and take a deep breath. Your chest and shoulders feel lighter. The whiplash of everything could hit you later, you couldn’t care less right now. All you wanted to do was eat, stretch, and take a nap.
Scaramouche looked at you dead in the eye and you feared the worst. Was he joking? Did he actually hate you and never want to see you again? Did-
“Goddamit- I dropped my wig…”
You stare at each other for a second before you burst out laughing. “That’s a shame! You didn’t look half bad in it~” you joked. “Oh please- You were head over heels for me and you know it!” “Ah, you got me there! Who knew you’d make such a fine girl! If only you could say the same about you know-Ow!” he punched your shoulder gently, but considering your current state it hurt more than he intended. “I’m sorry, Y/n- I-“ He checked the area to see if it was bruised or anything but was immediately met with a flick to the forehead. “Ow-!” “Haha, got you!” “You little-“
Both of your bickering would soon die down as soon as his parents would enter the room. It was obvious how you both turned stiff as boards. Acting as if you weren’t pulling each other’s hair like you once had.
Ei placed some flowers on the bed stand and Miko would sit down on the bed with some sweets in hand. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, Miss Y/n.” Ei bowed politely, “I’m not sure if my son had mentioned us to you. If not it’s alright- But we are his parents.” Miko started feeding some cake with a fork as she nodded along. “I’m very happy to see you make my son happy. It used to worry me that my son would die alone-“she feigned a tear falling from her eye. “MOM.” Blush spread across Scaramouche’s face as he crossed his arms. “Ah, excuse me, that’s beside the point! What I mean to say is that you shouldn’t worry about the wedding founding- Your new moms will buy you everything you will need-“ “THATS NOT ANY BETTER!” He exclaimed even redder. She smiled so innocently all while still looking a little confused. Miko finally chimed in, “What she means to say is that she supports you both no matter what. Even if you don’t think she agrees with you,” she turned her head towards him, “she believes you both will make the right choice. We hope you both can treat this as a new beginning. As I like to say, carpe diem!” “You never say that.” Ei tilted her head with a soft smile. “Well, I do now!”
All four of you burst out laughing. You guys talk a little more before they leave for their business dinner. Once again you and Scara are alone.
“Are you really sure you’re okay with marrying a pregnant woman?” “Of course I’m fine with it, since it being you and all.” Rubbing the back of his head he laid his head down on the bed, “Are YOU sure you wanna get married right away? Just because my mom mistook us for dating already doesn’t mean we should skip that part… Plus, what if you don’t like who I am…” You pet his soft purple hair with a smile, “Well, as long as you promise not to be a complete asshole, then I suppose we’ll be just fine!” “You think I’m an asshole?” “Haha, anyways…. What kind of wedding cake should we have? I was thinking of a [favorite flavor] cake! Ooohh and we can look at the different types of venues! Ah, I guess after that we need to plan a baby shower!”
He’d completely tuned you out and just stared at you, lovingly. Your skin glowed perfectly from the artificial light, and that smile of yours was perfect. You no longer looked tired and stressed; instead, you looked happy and not so tired. He couldn’t blame his ex-friend for falling for you. Although he feels a little jealous that he’s seen parts of you that now belong to his eyes only now.
Fingers tap up and down on the bed as if he’s contemplating something. You take notice and tap his shoulder, you ask if he’s listening. Suddenly he gets up- His soft lips are placed against your slightly chapped ones. It’s warm. Your eyes widen in surprise as you slowly melt into the kiss.
Once he pulls away you’re both gasping for air. Out of embarrassment, he hides his face in your neck. He’s embarrassed- you are too. “A-a little warning would���ve been nice. I was talking yknow?” “Shut up before I kiss you again..” You knew he was too embarrassed to do it again so you teased, “Yeah, I think you’d like that-“ Instead of another passionate kiss he instead peppered kisses all over your face. “I hate you.” “I love you, Scara.”
The wedding went amazing since his parents had done most of the planning (of course you both directed them) And your baby shower went just as well! Initially, you were both worried a certain someone would catch wind of it- and you’re sure he did. Thankfully the place was heavily guarded (, courtesy of Miko) and was also in a secluded area, along with there being a very strict guest list. You both already knew the gender so the part just consisted of fun baby shower games and many gifts from your friends and families.
You had been getting intensive therapy for the rest of your pregnancy. Those couple of months left you with deeper wounds than you had thought. Of course, you still have trouble with going out on your own and you’ve completely dropped going out (since you’re a mother now ofc) When you do have to go out alone you wear your hair differently each time along with a mask and sunglasses. Whenever someone gets a little too close they happen to get stopped by someone. Your bad dreams usually consist of you trying to run away but your legs move slowly or trying to scream but nothing comes out, and other things you’d rather not discuss...
Your delivery went well and luckily you gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Ei and Miko informed you that you had a week to name him. On the fifth day, you and Scara decided on [name], since you both liked the name and agreed on it. When both of the families came to see him you got the chance to meet Scara’s aunt and sister (who both happened to be named Makoto, although Scara called his sister Raiden since she was “scary”) The boy was blessed with your hair color (he has a red streak through it) but had his fathers eyes. At first, it scared you but with some affirming words from both sides of the family and your lover, you’ve grown to love them.
Some of your friends and family didn’t approve that Scara wasn’t the father, some even berating you and calling you names. The name-calling mostly came from Scara’s side of the family. Area
On your son's first birthday, he spoke his first words. “Mama!” You nearly cried tears of joy when he said that. Scaramouche frowned and pinched the boy's cheeks gently with a huff. Much to his surprise the boy spoke again, “Daddy!” Now both of you were crying tears of joy. You swaddled your boy in the softest blankets before you both cuddled him off to sleep. Both not believing you had been blessed with such a joy.
Once your son has gotten a little older he learned how to say the cat’s name, always gesturing his hands and babbling, “Meowmeow!” The now healthier cat would come to the boy and rub its head against your son accompanied by a purr.
Once he turned two years old you noticed how he started taking after his father, often mimicking him by making an angry face and huffing. All you could do was smile and kiss him while his father pouted behind you both. One time you had joked around with your young son by asking him, “What face does daddy make when he’s angry” and your son crossed his arms with a scowl on his face. You burst out laughing while your husband messed with his hair pretending to be upset.
You went back to work while Scara was a stay-at-home husband. On stressful days you would come home, sore and tired, but the moment your eyes laid on Scara’a resting figure along with your sons. Well, your heart simply melted into mush as you took about 30 pictures of them from all angles. You were convinced that all of the time you spent alone and suffering was worth it for this moment.
It felt like that person was a bad dream- but now, you’re wide awake and ready to face the future with your loving husband, and adorable son.
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Gawdamn I don’t stop yapping🙏 If you read all of this ty pookie!! there will be a $10 mil block of gold under your pillow when you wake up 😍😋 I will be writing some hcs (maybe) and a scenario where u encounter kazuha w your kid soon!!! (i promise) Anyways i’m knocking tf out… BAI><!!
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♡ taglist: @swivy123
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tondisus · 6 months ago
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can i get some dbh ao3 recs :0! i prefer canon compliant stuff (im a huge "he would not fucking say that!!!!" person) and any/no ships
Oh I've waited *years* for someone to ask me fic recs and I shall deliver.
Ik you technically asked for canon compliant stuff but honestly I'm the complete opposite about characters, like I look at two completely different characterizations and I'll go "oh maybe he would say both of those," I'm just generally a massive AU enjoyer.
So instead of trying to sort and struggle and figure out what to recommend, I'll just throw a bunch of stuff your way and hope at least something works!
Also I'm getting all the recs from my downloads so they're likely complete, my favorite character that I'm hopelessly hyperfixated on is Connor, I generally love a lot of angst & hurt/comfort, I'm not really into shipping and romance-focused fics that much and longer fics >> shorter fics, so my recommendations are gonna show those traits
I recommend literally any dbh fic by WayWardWonderer: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WayWardWonderer/pseuds/WayWardWonderer
They have genuinely carried my fandom experience, if I think I have nothing to read I just go back to their fics, i am so impressed how someone can write SO much great content
Accident prone: becoming human https://archiveofourown.org/works/15727149
Is a long fic post-pacifist best ending full of whump, angst, hurt/comfort, character development, just everything good. And when I say long, I mean 1.8mil words long.
Torn alliances https://archiveofourown.org/works/25009789 in which it's also a post-pacifist ending fic, except deviated Connor was shot by Markus in the church,  came back on the rooftop scene as a machine, and deviated there thanks to Hank. From there it explores what happens after in about a million words.
Sanction https://archiveofourown.org/series/2226099 is a series that also features the Markus-killed-Connor-in-church-but-he-survived-what-happens-now type story, the prequel has Connor & Carl interaction which while rare, is very precious to me in this fandom, and the sequel has some awesome angst about the Amanda takeover and it's potential consequences/meanings
Detroit 07 https://archiveofourown.org/series/1473497
Is a series that really focuses on the dpd police department and their interactions post-pacifist ending, the characters are basically built from nothing by the author so this could be a non-canon-compliant type of fic but I listed it anyway cuz it's an awesome series what can I say
Cutting ties https://archiveofourown.org/series/2738356 is a series of fics more about Connor and his struggle with deviancy and android kind, I honestly started reading this for the Connor & North friendship cuz damn i love those two and their interactions
Deviating and Solving Crime with 100% Human Detective Connor https://archiveofourown.org/works/29270769 is abt Connor being deviant the entire time but staying undercover as a detective in the DPD, super hilarious imo, loved the characterization of basically everyone, probably the longest 5 + 1 type fic I've read
File not found https://archiveofourown.org/works/32842771
Is an au fic of the game timeline where Connor is simultaneously deviant and machine, he has to delete memories of himself letting deviants go to hide his actions from cyberlife, and Hank is hostile at first, which is a fun part.
Reset https://archiveofourown.org/works/15118730/chapters/35054933 is a classic time-travel fix-it trope, 8 months after a failed revolution, Connor goes back in time thanks to Kamski and, well, fixes stuff. Sassy Connor is my beloved fr he's so awesome.
I'd probably have more recs (seeing as I have over 350+ downloaded detroit fics) and would know more specifically which ones were the more canon-compliant ones but the hyperfixation is sporadic and comes back every few years and it just came back very recently again, so I don't remember completely what all fics were about and how much I liked them (why did I not make summaries and list thoughts why past me why were you DUMB) but the ones I listed are hopefully very readable 👍
Hope you find something here you like / haven't read yet :D
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equallyshaw · 1 year ago
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ᴅᴀʏ ᴇʟᴇᴠᴇɴ: ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ ʜᴏʟɪᴅᴀʏꜱ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴜɢʜᴇꜱ- ʙᴀʀᴢᴀʟ ꜰᴀᴍɪʟʏ - ᴍᴀᴛ ʙᴀʀᴢᴀʟ x ᴏᴄ ʜᴜɢʜᴇꜱ
social media addition
↳ part of holidays with equallyshaw.
↳ the blurb itself
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@mirandabarzal: annual hughes-barzal holiday trip did not disappoint
tags: matbarzal, jackhughes, _quinnhughes, lhughes_06, elblue6
211k likes, 98.9k comments.
@/matbarzal: love you my beautiful wife
↳ @/lianabarzal: yuck
↳ @/lhughes_06: yuck indeed
↳ @mirandabarzal: ilu hun
@/jackhughes: the gang back together 🤪
↳ @/trevorzegras: just missing me
↳ @mirandabarzal: not a chance lmao
@/_quinnhughes: I just know dad was glaring at jack
↳ @mirandabarzal: no he was, it was when he was talking about his recent driving experience
↳ @/lhughes_06: I thought dad was gonna kill him
↳ @mirandabarzal: me too
@/taryntkachuk: theo and marie getting too big 🥲
↳ @/matbarzal: ik its not fair!
↳ @mirandabarzal: not fair in the slightest
@/titobeauv91: miss my fav nice and nephew ):
↳ @mirandabarzal: maybe I take a trip to chicago ??👀
↳ @/titobeauv91: I vote yes !!!
↳ @/matbarzal: gonna need all the pics in the world
@/elblue6: such a great trip! cant wait to go back (:
↳ @/matbarzal: same here mama hughes!
@fan01: so I guess the rumors arent true...they arent separating lmao
↳ @fan02: they could be who knows, they may just be putting out a united front ?
↳ @fan03: check mat's post lol
@holl.horvat: unfazed queen
↳ @/sydneymartin: I wanna be her when i grow up
↳ @mirandahughes: I could say the same about yall 🤍
_
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@ / mat barzal: annual hughes-barzal holiday trip was one for the book
Tags: mirandabarzal, jackhughes, lhughes_6 & _quinnhughes
102k likes, 23.4k comments.
@/elblue6: the last one 🥺
↳ @mirandabarzal: cuties
@/lhughes_06: we clean up nice
↳ @/jackhughes: no fr
↳ @/matbarzal: gotta dress up for success
↳ @/_quinnhughes: and you still lost the 'hardest shot' at the driving range...
↳ @/matbarzal: If I dont recall..ive won 3 times in 5 years so
↳ @/lhughes_06: tides are turning
↳ @/jackhughes: trust we will beat you again and again
@/lianabarzal: 3rd and 4th 🥺
↳ @mirandabarzal: my favs
@/mattymarts17: I already know theo is gonna be better at golf than you
↳ @mirandabarzal: Unfortunately he has three uncles waiting in the wings to perfect his game
↳ @/jackhughes: you'd be correct
@/tysonjost: mom and dad's night out
↳ @mirandabarzal: 🤫
↳ @/matbarzal: 😈😈
↳ @mirandabarzal: ew gross
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tags: @toasttt11 @jayda12 @jackhues @dancerbailey3 @cuttergauthier
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